24 of us on holiday...

[afrikat]

I have a group of university friends and we have all kept in touch 15 years on (all mid 30s now). We've decided we are having a big group holiday next year and have booked a large house in Italy.

There will be 11 adults and 13 children, has anyone done a large group trip like this before? How did you organise things like cooking and shopping etc?

We used to do it every New Year.
Key to success was space for everyone but communal space too.
Food we started off doing shopping lists in pre supermarket delivery days but people rarely stuck to the list and essential items were missing.
Then we moved to internet delivery. One person drew up menus (agreed with everyone and catering for vegetarians and coeliacs). Then did a shop based on that menu with some snacks thrown in.
No booze included as everyone was expected to bring what they wanted to drink.
People also bought extras left over from Christmas or that they’d cooked. These weren’t included in costs and were considered gifts.

You need to decide re children’s meals and costings. We wanted adult meals in the evening so we did high tea for little ones. Older children could stay up and play out of the way until bedtime but didn’t sit with us. They wandered in, of course, but were sorted and sent away.
By the time they got to their mid teens they sat with us and joined in.

We worked out a charging strategy but the wealthier voluntarily subsidised the poorer. Students paid less, for example. We paid per adult and a reduced amount for children over 5 years.

Meals out weren’t included. I think, like most things in life, clear communication from the outset is key to success. There needs to be clarity about what is provided, work sharing, activities and expectations. Not wooden or inflexible but a clear idea that reflects reality.

We did it a couple of times with family,
We paid per person with babies free. We made up a menu plan, organised an internet shop. Won’t be repeating!! Taking into account: vegetarian/ no red meat/ nothing too spicy/ no lamb/ kids that only eat pizza or burgers/ no salmon/ big drinkers/ greedy fuckers who ate all the snacks.
Some of it was fun. Families are different though. I think it was the husbands who made it tricksy rather than the whole experience.

Oh and deciding the rooms. That was names in a hat for each room aside from mum and stepdad. We decided theirs first and then worked from there.

We’ve done a few group holidays and echo the above of communal large space bring necessary and to try to get rooms which feel equal. Also make sure people know they can dip in and out of activities- everyone having to join in and hang around 24/7 is what breeds disagreements.

Definitely big online shop but then we had people do top up shops during the week or each couple would cook on a different night. We used a great money splitting app called Splitwise which means everything people buy can be added on and split by whoever used it. E.g if someone did a booze run but two people weren’t drinking you could take them out of the share. It then totals it all up for you so you only have to do one set of bank transfers. It has transformed group hols for us as it is so easy to tot it all up and sort it later.
Would agree that it’s wise to have a conversation early on though about whether to charge for children or how much to do so.

And hopefully given you are all friends you can expect some flexibility. Eg last holiday I wasn’t drinking but I said to include me because they didn’t charge anything for my toddler and the food they ate. Also I did less cooking because of said toddler so felt I should contribute in other ways. Good luck- they’re so fun and hopefully it will be the start of many more!

I did this with 20-odd friends earlier this year, though we were all child-free. Food wise we just split everything equally for ease - if all the children in the party will be eating proper meals then I’d advise counting them as “full people” and including them in the split, but babies eating little excluded. Alcohol for us - everyone sorted their own, so nobody had to worry about drinking more or less or spirits rather than cheap wine etc. And on the days we cooked dinner we all pitched in, even if “pitching in” meant sitting at the kitchen dining table chatting and laughing with the people doing the actual chopping and cooking. It felt very inclusive and sociable, which is important, nobody felt like they were being abandoned in the kitchen to do all the work whilst others had fun elsewhere.

I’m now wondering if it’s the same house that 20-odd friends and I rented for a week in Italy earlier this year - there weren’t that many big enough!

Brilliant advice thanks all