Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

No space from new baby..help

10 replies

Minette5 · 08/11/2018 19:44

So we have a 3yr old who is pretty normal to amazing when it comes to behaviour so we thought well why not have another. Ummmm no2 Is a nightmare and I need some ideas please!! She is currently asleep on me as she will not settle in her own cot. She was going down but only at 9 or 10pm after an evening of me holding her now she won't sleep without me. Yes I keep trying and she screams and wakes up fully meaning another couple of hours to go back to sleep. We won't leave her to cry it out other than that pile on suggestions even if I have tried them. Next she hates her dad she will only go to him for 2mins if he is lucky. She isn't too keen on anyone else except my mum tbh and our 3yr old. This means doing anything is becoming impossible, dad does his best and holds her so I can cook or we put her down but inevitably it ends up as screaming until I can get her and then calm her down. She has a few allergies so we have eliminated certain foods from my diet as I'm ebf. These have contributed to tummy pains etc. I have 3 different slings and use them when I can but can't use them for very long as I have a bad back and hips. Honestly we are at our wits end. I have barely anytime for myself, son, partner or housework. I don't know what else to do. She does go on her play mat and in a bouncy chair in the morning quite happily for half an hour or so then it's continual up down scream up down scream as well as all the time spent feeding and changing her. My poor 3yr old is starting to misbehave and I am sure it is linked to having less mummy time. Any ideas? Thanks

OP posts:
sleepismysuperpower1 · 08/11/2018 19:50

would it be possible for you to invest in one of these? if you read the reviews they are all talking about similar situations to the one you are in

Doghorsechicken · 08/11/2018 19:58

I would encourage more daddy & baby time between feeds. So he can read to her, change her & cuddle. Do this for a little while as often as possible (preferably daily). She needs some time to bond with daddy. Perhaps you should be out of the picture for this too, out of sight & earshot. It gives you chance to do a bit of housework in peace but more importantly you could spend this window of time with 3yo. It will be tough at first but the sooner she bonds with daddy the easier it will be for you! I know my DS used to want to sleep on me all the time but I phased it out by swaddling him and holding him whilst he was dropping to sleep. Then I kept moving him about so he kept peeping & checking I was still there. Eventually he didn’t bother opening his eyes anymore & I could finally put him down in his Moses basket. It took a while the first couple of times but he soon got used to it. The swaddling made it feel like I was still holding him.

I hope that makes sense! Good luck OP

Minette5 · 08/11/2018 20:10

Thanks that all sounds good advice, I was thinking small chunks of daddy time where I appear before she gets upset.

OP posts:

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

pastabest · 08/11/2018 20:17

How old is she?

DC2 was like this until she hit about 4mo and now she is delightful(ish).

Kko1986 · 08/11/2018 21:10

We put a hot water bottle in our babys bed to warm it up then took it out as we transferred her so it was warm like our bodies and we also have a my hummy that helped a lot

Accountant222 · 08/11/2018 21:32

Oh god, that brings back memories and not good ones, no advice but I was never going to another after that little bugger.

Drogosnextwife · 08/11/2018 21:36

No advice sorry, just wanted to let you know you are not alone. My ds2 was the same, absolute nightmare. Accepted no one but me, he is now 5 and is still a total mummy's boy, it was so stressful and I ended up quite depressed. I hope you figure out a way to ease the situation.

Minette5 · 08/11/2018 21:55

3 months

OP posts:
Minette5 · 08/11/2018 22:00

Nice to hear I am not alone. The older one is a mummy's boy so finding it hard. My poor fiance can have both kids cry at him within half an hr of getting home as they both want mummy not him! On the plus side he has never made any comments about his work being harder or the house being a mess when I am at home, he totally gets it

OP posts:
anniehm · 08/11/2018 22:17

I had mine either in a carrier so I could carry on doing jobs (I was an apartment block manager, it's amazing what you can do carrying a child!) we bought a swing which we wound up which works for short periods 15-20 mins for cooking. Neither of mine were keen on evening sleep at first, dd1 was 2 before she actually went to bed before 10pm but they didn't go to nursery so slept in

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread