Anyone looking to stop drinking completely and worried about how it will impact their social life and friendships?

[nina0bambina]

I’ve just completed Stoptober and I’ve decided to keep it up. I wasn’t a particularly big drinker anyway but I’ve certainly noticed a positive impact already. I’ve finally been able to stick to a housework routine, I’m sleeping better and I don’t miss the hangovers or anxiety that comes with drinking too much.

I’m also TTC so I’m really trying to be healthy. FYI, none of my friends have kids yet.

I’m just a bit worried about what will this mean for my friendships. I do have friends who I usually don’t drink with but when my main group of friends get together we always drink, almost without exception. If we go away for a weekend the whole weekend will pretty much revolve around drinking too.

These are very good friends and they won’t pressure me into drinking or anything like that but I just find it boring hanging out with drunk people whilst sober and tend to find the conversation quite repetitive and one sided after a certain point. I feel like I should point out that my friends are absolutely not boring by the way, it’s just the alcohol.

Has anyone been in this predicament and how did your friendships evolve? I know it sounds silly but I wouldn’t know what to suggest doing instead of going to a pub etc, especially now it’s winter. Any ideas welcome!

Would love to hear your experiences of going sober.

I have never 'gone sober' but I drink very rarely and don't drink wine or champagne/celebratory bubbly.
Initially it was because I never liked the taste of alcohol, and essentially, if I do drink I'm terrified of being sick, so I have an early 'off' button which others don't have.
In my experience people who drink as a large part of their life or who see it as normal to drink alcohol will eye you with suspicion. In your situation they will assume you're pregnant or that you have come over all moralistic. As I refuse wine or bubbly 99% of people find this odd, and offer red instead of white or ask if I'm having something else. They ask why aren't you drinking. You may have friends who are more relaxed, but most drinking people don't like it if someone in the crowd is sober.

I went on a course for two days this week with two colleagues. They both drank three cans of g and t each on a two hour train journey, evenings included drinks again, and on our return, at the station at 2.30pm, had two g and ts before boarding the train. They know I don't drink much and didn't drink during the two days but it has taken a lot of getting to know them for them to accept that I don't drink much at all , and given the frequency with which the majority of socialising people do drink, I have always found myself having to explain myself. Perhaps I shouldn't!