What would you make of this comment?

[allhallowsevie]

There's a store I go to regularly and have got friendly with a few staff. One male in particular often makes the effort to come over and talk or ask if I need any assistance with anything.

Me and dp both shop there and when we are together I notice that particular colleague will not be as eager to come and have a chat.

Anyway last time I was in there on my own, the colleague said that I was adorable  now I'm 3 / 4 years older than him so I felt quite embarrassed to be called adorable by someone a bit younger than me.

I told dp and he wasn't to impressed and said he had an inkling that the colleague liked me.

So I just wondered what you would make of this if a male called you adorable?

Well he clearly likes you, you aren't single so just let him carry on with his crush.

I'd think he was a creepy get and I wouldn't go back.

But then I'm a prickly old cow these days.

I don't want the comment to stop me going in the shop! I wasn't sure if it was a compliment or insult as I found it a bit patronising. I would call a baby adorable but not a grown woman.

I'm with you OP. And I would have told him I found that patronising. It's not an age thing - I wouldn't have find that acceptable if an older person said it either! It's also very inappropriate, considering her clearly knows you're in a relationship.

Adorable doesn’t sound like something a straight man would say to a woman he fancies. It’s more like something a camp gay man would say or something you would say to a child or a pet.

Colleague is the wrong term to use here btw.

Anois why is colleague the wrong term to use?

YY to patronising. I don't like being called 'lovely' either.

If you call someone a colleague it means you yourself work with them. You should say “the worker’s colleague” or just simply “one of the workers”

I like the compliment “adorable!” He’s got a crush on you!

I think I will try and distance myself a bit from him then!

I've always referred to any workers as colleagues and never been corrected up until now.

I'd not think too much of it tbh but I agree it is patronising.

Just as a side note; if this chap works in say Sainsbury's and you refer to him using the word "colleague" it implies that you also work for Sainsbury's.

It's a weird compliment, agree that it seems more something a gay guy would say?

A colleague is someone you work with. No I wouldn't be too happy if someone called me adorable, it's a bit of a weird choice of words but if he has a little crush then perhaps it just slipped out.

Probably a tongue tied crush, pulling out a comedy choice of compliment.

I would think adorable is an odd word to use for someone older than about 10. And that he either has a crush or is taking the piss. Seems like he flirts with you so a crush.

I'd be wary of him in future coz I wouldn't want to deal with his crush. However, I don't think that is best way to deal with it.

DD (who is amazing in this respect) would tackle it head on if there was repeat attentive remarks like OP describes. She would say "Listen, I'm sorry to hurt your feelings but I need to tell you that in no way am I available... well, it's just that when you say things like that, it sounds like you have a crush on me. It's flattering but I'm not that into you.... You might not realise that I'm already married... I hope that we can continue to be on friendly terms otherwise."

I aspire to be as calmly blame-free direct as DD.
Some people have boundary issues and they don't mean anything inappropriate, they just say or do the wrong thing (socially clumsy). I'd want to be kind in case that was their issue.

He's a colleague of the fellow worker in his workplace. I'd be so amazed if someone described me as adorable, I'd probably put an ad in the national press to tell the world. I won't hold my breath though.

He's not your colleague as you don't work there.

His age doesn't matter, 3-4 years younger? So what? The adorable comment is odd though.

Adorable what does he think you are a kitten.
Also seems very unprofessional to me. Iwonder what the other customers would make of that. I wouldn't like it. Id be thinking or rather saying is her money so much more "adorable" than mine.