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Au pair dilema

5 replies

Navybabyblue · 27/10/2018 15:40

Hello everyone Smile
I am a single mother. I work long hours. Baby father abroad. I live on my own with my toddler. We are separated. So i decided to look for an au pair to help for few hours. She also goes to nursery. I did put a private advert for au pair. Out of many applicants one caught my attention- a very lovely 18 years old girl from Spain, who lives with her aunt who lost her husband many years ago and is childless. They are originally from south americ, but have Spanish passport. The girl lives with her aunt since she was 10. She went to Spain to be her aunt companion.

I have been liaising with the girl and she has send me various documentations from referenced to copy criminal record. She is very excited about coming to London in January.she seems decent.

This week she asked me if I could speak to her aunt via video link. Her aunt was very worried about letting her come to london to an unknown home - understandable. I soke to her aunt this morning .

She told me how sad she was about her niece wanting to leave her. She spent over 2000 euros ago to bring her from south america 8 years ago, however she was aware she could not stop her.

I spoke to her aunt this morning. However, she said she would feel calmer about her niece coming to London if both could come for a weekend or few days in December to meet me and stay with me so she ( the aunt) could get to know me better. Also she wants me to speak on the phone to both her parents who are separated (they live in South america).

While I understand her concerns, I am finding all this a bit overwhelming. I don't feel comfortable having her aunt around ( my flat is tiny), besides I don't understand why I have to speak to both parents. I am also scare the aunt may become an unexpected frequent visitor. I am having cold feet now. I am been unreasonable?
I really welcome everyone's opinion

OP posts:
gothefcktosleep · 27/10/2018 15:45

Sounds like it could turn into one big waste of time. The aunt wants a weekend with free accommodation in London.

JuniperBeer · 27/10/2018 15:48

Use au pair world. Step away from this one

bobisbored · 27/10/2018 15:49

Tell them they are welcome to come over to meet you and see your home but they make their own arrangements for accommodation whilst they are here. Don't speak to her parents, you've spoken to the aunt. That should be enough, she's an adult. You need to be clear of your expectations from the start. My brother and his wife have a Spanish au pair. They have a strict no overnight guests policy, this includes her family. They come to visit and they stay in a hotel nearby.

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Loopytiles · 27/10/2018 15:50

I wouldn’t agree to the aunt coming. No way!

I would look for someone else.

The potential au pair is an adult and needs to make her own decisions. Her aunt can decide whether or not to continue to financially support her niece.

Are you 100% sure the niece has permission - and documentation - to work in Europe?

underneaththeash · 27/10/2018 15:51

We have au pairs and I wouldn't feel comfortable with that either, especially if you don't have the room. I'd go with someone else on au pair world).

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