When will I feel like a proper adult?

[MishMashMosher]

I'm 27, married with 2 kids, pets and a job, yet I still don't feel like a proper adult yet. I still feel like I'm about 17 inside. A lot of the time I just feel like I'm winging it! Does anyone else feel like this? Will I ever feel like a grown up?

I'm 43, mother of one, divorced, work in a responsible job. I'm winging it too!!!

We’re all winging it.

Mostly I feel I’m winging it. Moments when I’ve dealt with grief make me feel properly grown up. Also when I’m around people in their late teens/early twenties I realise that I’m actually not like that anymore.

I think that when you are juggling kids, family, work you are so busy that you feel like you are winging it. You are not - this is adult life!
I feel like an adult now I am less busy with the kids.
Another sign of true adulthood is when you start to like red wine and olives!

The only times I really feel grown up (mid 40s) is when talking about mortgages, ISAs and pensions. Even then, it still usually disintegrates into talking about how much lego you could get with the proceeds...

I'm so pleased to see I'm not the only one. Sometimes I think about when I was little and I'd look at my parents and thought they knew everything and saw them as proper grown ups. I wonder if that's what my dc think about me.

I don't like olives or red wine so I must still be a child

Hopefully not too soon! I’m 46 and still waiting to grow up. I feel like such a fraud amongst the parents at my kids’ schools. To be honest though, I much prefer the parents of the teens (all in their 40s/50s/60s even). None of them are ‘sensible’!

I have to say, middle age is so much better than youth in this regard. There’s a bit of a ‘Ah f*ck it’ attitude.

I too wonder if my kids will disown me once they fully acknowledge my oil tankers for feet of clay.
We’re all winging it.

Completely agree! Winged it until earlier this year when my father died and suddenly had to be "adult" for my 88 year old mother. I'm 49 and have only just felt grown up.

Mine was when I bought a washing machine after mine broke. Despite buying a house and getting married prior to this I still thought this was the most grown up thing I’ve done.

I get that the post might be light hearted and I’m sorry if I misread.

But at 27, you surely realise adults are not infallible, they make mistakes, get unwell, scared, lonely. You can be all of those things and an adult.

Being an adult is about taking responsibility. Simple as. I do find these threads a bit because it isn’t a feeling, it’s a fact - in this country you become an adult aged 18. The growing up part takes longer but that’s a process not a feeling.

My 92 year old grandad says he still doesn’t feel like an adult...

My teenager makes me feel like a grown up in all the worst ways.
The rest of the time I’m still winging it day to day.

I'm 38 and I still don't feel grown up

Oh and I've been divorced,remarried and had a child

I felt like an adult when I had to spend £2.5k on a new boiler. It's rubbish. I try not to be too much of an adult for too long.

I'm mid 30s and I don't feel like an adult. I've had career changes, divorce, remarriage, bought and sold a couple of houses, I am into ales and cars. Still like Lego and sometimes want an adultier adult to do boring things or make me soup when I am ill.

I know what you mean about wanting an adultier adult sometimes.

My 92 year old grandad says he still doesn’t feel like an adult..

Thats the best thing I've read all day.
Reminds me of my Grandfather who was of similar vintage "you know your getting old when the kids retire!"

I'm 39 and still don't feel like an adult & that I'm just winging it.
Reality check every so often with the youngsters at work - didn't know oasis only born in 1994 type thing and with the realisation that my parents are aging so I must be too but otherwise just living day by day!

I'm almost 40 and at the point at work where when things go a bit shit people look to me as the responsible adult. I don't feel like the responsible adult and Ann slightly scared one day they'll find me out 

I'm 40, I still think I could hang out with my 15 yr old daughter and have a great time 😂

I'm 27, have a mortgage, a stepdaughter and still don't feel like an adult most of the time. Though replacing the boiler was a very adulty thing to have to do.

I'm in my 50s with 20-something DC & I'm still winging it.

I need to replace my boiler, I might need to ask PoesyCherish what to do!

I do often look for a more adult adult for reassurance at times. I’m 32, married with a toddler.

I once had a meltdown over stock cubes. My most adult moment I think 😂