Such a shitty few years for my family and I'm sick of it

[RedPandaMama]

All happened on my small side of the family recently:

• I got pregnant at 20 and my family disowned my for the length of the pregnancy. It was one of the shittiest times of my life. DD is 1 now and they love her but still bitch about me for it.
• mum's sister almost died from a brain hemorrhage, she has pretty much recovered now but still suffers PTSD and panic attacks
• my baby cousin died
• my grandad got cancer, made a full recovery, then 6 months later got a different cancer and died. He was only 69. Leaving my nan a widow. 3 months later her best friend also died of cancer.
• my dad left my mum. Mum is now underweight and depressed. Dad now has new family.

And tonight DP has gone into hospital with some sort of mystery infection and I'm left at home worrying with 1 year old DD. And she keeps waking up crying because she has a cold.

I'm just sick of shit happening to us.
I know I know some people definitely have it worse, but I don't think I can handle any more stress. I'm working 3 part time jobs at the moment as well as studying for a masters that only started 2 weeks ago and I am massively behind on. We're moving house in 3 weeks and haven't even thought about packing and buying furniture. Baby keeps getting colds from nursery and our cat is super old and randomly shits on the floor and I am just recovering from strep throat and feel like crap myself and AGUZNDHIWLSN HELP mashes face on keyboard please tell me it gets better.

Sorry. Needed to vent desperately. Need a holiday. Need a break.

Oh, my lovely, i have no great words of wisdom-I just wanted you to know I know exactly how you feel. I have days where I am raging at the world because it must be our turn for all the crap on crap on crap to stop. Just wanted to stand and offer a hand hold.

OP I'm so so sorry and every well wish for your DP. Contact the college asap and tell them your story. My friend works as a lecturer and she is always saying if people just came to her when stuff was happening as opposed to after they'd failed or missed an exam/course/project. There's no answer for what's going on, some people just seem to go through so much-our ils have gone through so much for years-every time we think things are improving there's knock after knock.

Really sorry you're having to go through all this. It really is shit. But it does get better.

I look back on parts of my life and almost can't believe how much of a shitshow it all was.

It'll balance back out in time. 💛 Just accept it's time, for now, to batten down the hatches, get through this, and take as much care of yourself as you possibly can. 💛

That sounds terribly tough.

I'd like to reiterate what stayathomer says - I'm a university lecturer, and I would always want to know if a student had difficulties at home that were affecting their studies. Please talk to your college about everything that's going on if you haven't already done so.

Seitch your degree from full to part time or even better do a module a year. My cousin is doing it a module a year and it will take longer. However, she has breathing space and a better chance of passing with a decent grade. She, like you, has a lot of personal issues to deal with and her university has been very supportive.

Switch

Errr you're doing a Masters aged 22? So you completed your undergrad while all that was happening, with a small baby and are now onto an MA? You, my dear, are FREAKING AWESOME!
I'm really sorry for the shit hand life has dealt you, but the cosmos clearly had you picked out as someone who is going to succeed at life however much shit it throws your way.
You've got this, you really have. I am in awe of the fact you've come this far. So if nothing else feels good right now, take heart from the fact that a total random on the internet thinks you're bloody incredible!

Thank you everyone. A rant to random internet strangers really helped thank you for all the kindness.

DP has an infection and is back home but on masses of antibiotics to sort him out. Just glad he's okay.
I'm in work today (wasn't much I could do at home) and will be getting a £500 bonus as I've hit my sales target so that's really cheered me up. I only earn £700 a month so that's a huge amount to me!

Thanks so much.

What Imaginary Cat said. I thought my own DD did well having DGS at the start of her 3rd year, but you, OP, are full of awesomeness.

That's a lot for anyone to cope with OP. Really hope things start getting better for you. Keep going

Spend the £500 bonus on packers to help you move. That saved my sanity.

When u think u can’t do it anymore...... Remember that u have come this far. And got through all of that already. You obviously far Stronger than u think u are. Sounds like u doing an amazing job of keeping it together so far. Keep going. It will get better.