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Tell me about your kid being an ungrateful wretch on holiday

226 replies

MorrisZapp · 16/10/2018 16:06

My son is 8 and we have just taken him on an amazing short break to London. Entire thing planned round him. Harry Potter tour, amazing lego shop, chain restaurants to satisfy his boring palate. We've had a great time but now heading home in hideous mood due to him being rude and ghastly in the last few hours of our trip.

I've just spent the last part of this holiday standing in Hyde Park in beautiful autumn sun having a three way raging row with DS and DP.

I never got given anything like this when I was a kid but I know my mum tore her hair out at our ingratitude and moaning when we did go on trips.

I'm not looking for advice, DS will grow up and become human, as I did.

I just want someone to say they've felt this frustration too, and maybe get some free gin or something... A AAAAAAAARGH

OP posts:
NewYoiker · 17/10/2018 05:04

@ThriftyMcThrifty Good for you!

LooksBetterWithAFilter · 17/10/2018 05:18

We are on holiday just now in Rome. 8 year old ds2 and 15 year old dad have been great Barca few moans when we’ve done a lot of walking. 12 year old ds1 can stay at home next time. Every time I try to remove him from his iPad he starts grumping and winding up his siblings. Stood bored in the Sistine chapel yesterday don’t think he looked up once. And were in Italy ffs so of course we’ve eaten in McDonald’s 3 bloody times because the 12 year old is sooooo fussy we had to feed him somehow.
We’ve had glorious weathe, on a site with a lovely pool, he had a fair whack of spending money and he’s gripping it so tightly to spend on something at home. Tbh there is too many petty grumps from him to list.
We are driving to Pompeii today. Cannot wait to hear how underwhelmed by that he is.

GreenFieldsofFrance · 17/10/2018 06:39

The amount of times my dh has indicated to come off the motorway and turn back from the journey to some day out / the airport for a holiday because my dcs have already started their whinging is too high to count. It doesn't matter where we are, local National Trust, France, legoland, could be anywhere, and they're at it.

I genuinely went on 1 solitary holiday as a child and that was 2 nights to pontins. I'm sure my epic rants reminding them of this will be stuff of family folklore one day and we'll laugh about it 

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Donthugmeimscared · 17/10/2018 06:41

I am piss poor at the moment. Saved up for ages to take the three children out to a theme park for the day and to be able to treat them to a meal out. All they did was argue and moan all day long. I ended up being that parent stomping back to the car hissing "this was suppose to be fun!". To add salt to the wound the next day they were teling their friends how it was the "best day ever".

Skittlesandbeer · 17/10/2018 06:45

Dibs on Jamaican granny too...

our airport is only 40 minutes from our front door, do you think it works equally well if you threaten to ship them out of their own country? Hmm

Fluffycloudland77 · 17/10/2018 06:55

Jamaican granny needs her own parenting show.

The only holidays I remember as a kid was going to my grans. Parents took me all over the country, can’t remember any of it.

Soontobe60 · 17/10/2018 06:58

We've had several holidays with DD in her teens - Thailand, USA, Canada, Sri Lanka. On every holiday she has had moments of being an utter monster of ingratitude!
Speedboat rides in Thailand followed by elephant sanctuary - "boring"
Grand Canyon at sunset -" why is there no mac Donald's?"
Whale watching -" so what, it's just a pod of killer whales!"
Scenic train ride through rice fields "this train is crap, it stinks of piss" said very loudly! To be fair, she was right on this one 😂😂😂
Walking through a WW2 museum in France " they're just dead people"

Worst moment was NYE in Thailand getting ready for the evening banquet having a screaming match with her because she didn't want to go. When we eventually got to the bar, everyone turned and stared at us! Seems shouty voices travel very far when your patio doors are wide open 😱😱😱

Now she's older and wiser, she visits places with totally different eyes. She took me on a trip to Berlin to visit all WW2 stuff, begged to come back to Canada with us to see more "amazing" whales, and plans her own holidays around all the things she used to moan about when we took her.

MargaretDribble · 17/10/2018 07:21

One year we took DS1 and DD on holiday in a caravan. The caravan was tiny, we were in a part of the country we have never felt the need to return to and DS was so awful we came home a night early and never took him on holiday again.
He is 43 now, married with children and still moans if his DW books a holiday.

Storm4star · 17/10/2018 07:26

I do think it’s much more fun to go away with your DCs once they’re adults, which is usually the time people stop doing it! I’m a single parent and could only afford holidays once they got older and my circumstances improved. Every year now I go away with either my DD or DS and we have a great time. I guess at some point it will stop when they have families of their own but we’ve had some really good holidays now.

MargaretDribble · 17/10/2018 07:34

Stormstar DD and I have had brilliant holidays since she grew up and like similar things.

Allyg1185 · 17/10/2018 07:41

Omg yes! My ds 7 is EXACTLY the same but not just on holidays but general days out, walks etc. One time that sticks in my mind is when we went to a farm/ softplay outdoor place and there was a wee train doing rides round the farm at no point did I say ds couldn't go on it all I said was I would need to get change. All hell broke loose cause he wanted on the train that instant. He stood there with a face on him and was completely obnoxious about it. Even after he had had a turn his face still tripped him

RobinEllacott · 17/10/2018 07:43

Oh God, me too. Morris, I was on a thread with you years ago about how bad parenting is for the mental health - I think your DS Is the same age as mine.

We went to America this summer - trip of a lifetime, DS was really, really excited about it. He whinged, moaned, stropped and generally made everything unbearable for the first two or three days. On day 3 I completely lost it and told him I was never taking him anywhere again if he didn't buck his ideas up, because he was spoiling what should have been a lovely holiday for all three of us. It improved a bit after that, but I'm not going to look back fondly on the trip.

I'd quite happily not have holidays at all - I work long hours and never get to see our house in daylight between October and March - but DH spends much more time at home than I do and is keen to get away. However, we've learnt our lesson from this summer: next year will be low-key and UK.

StillMedusa · 17/10/2018 07:49

Just reading these gives me the chills.
When dh left the RAF we took the kids to Florida..aged 8,11,12 and 13. It was to be our 'trip of a lifetime'.

The 12 year old had just turned into Kevin a year early.
I think he stormed off at every theme park, every beach. By the time we went on a trip through the Glades I was ready to chuck him to the alligators. He was VILE. Argued constantly, sulked, stropped, was a miserable sod.

And stayed that way for the next 5 years! We didn't try another holiday abroad until he was 17 and becoming human again!

I can recommend going on holiday with them when they are adults tho... all fab now and last year I did an 8 week road trip with DD2 through USA and Canada and we had a wonderful time!

Oblomov18 · 17/10/2018 07:51

I find my 2 ds's generally blasé and ungrateful and unappreciative. Makes me really sad. Have told them so as well: in arguments when I lost it, but also calmly.
It makes me very sad. One teacher commented that 'children are like this these days.
I find that hard to accept and am not sure what I'm supposed to do.

Lweji · 17/10/2018 07:51

now heading home in hideous mood due to him being rude and ghastly in the last few hours of our trip.

He's human.
A human child who gets tired and grumpy at the end of a long day trip.

It's not ungratefulness FGS.

You, as a parent should know better.

Make the next amazing trip shorter and with bigger breaks. Still expect tiredness.

Poor child.

Womanlikeme · 17/10/2018 07:52

My dd was so badly behaved on a holiday to Spain when she was 4 that I took her to the doctor for her behaviour problems when we got back. True story.

Oblomov18 · 17/10/2018 07:54

I find the teenagers I know even worse. They are lovely boys. (Both my boys play in get nice football teams) But completely unappreciative and ungrateful.
Everyone I know says children aged 10-20 are just like this now. 

Pigletpoglet · 17/10/2018 07:56

We had a miserable ski trip with a small DD (skiing with children being hard work at the best of times). But skiing is our favourite thing in the world. So the following year we paid her. £5 per day that she skied all day without whinging. Fucking bargain and best £35 we've ever spent. Not only that, but because she was working so hard not to whinge, she actually enjoyed herself and has been a keen skier ever since...

TheClitterati · 17/10/2018 08:01

We had 2 weeks in Menorca this year.

Turns out they hate the beach. The sand!!!!' Of course they both had lovely time when we went to the actual beach and didn't want to leave. But the moaning and whining - aargh.

So I put them in kids club and went to beach by myself every morning. I was not going to miss out. Picked up DC at 1 and then we went to pool in afternoons. Everyone )eventually) happy.

contrary13 · 17/10/2018 08:36

I was the mother in Spain snarling, almost, at her 12 year old daughter about not being a spoiled, ungrateful little wretch whilst we were having an impromptu guided tour by the owner... the actual owner... of the city's zoo, all because he'd been enchanted by her 4 year old brother's awe-struck glee at being separated from animals by (very thick) windows. Whilst my son pranced about, listening avidly to every word the lovely man told us (well, my son, really) about the different animals, and their personalities, and actually got to hold a baby Chimpanzee... my daughter flounced and glowered, and literally sulked because it wasn't her getting the attention. It was our first holiday as a single-parent family, and I'd deliberately included her in the planning of it - and she was the one who insisted that we go to the (very animal/visitor friendly, lovely place, totally into conservation of the various species...) zoo, to surprise her little brother. She was stroppy for most of the holiday, though, because I'd borrowed my brother's self-catering time-share and not booked an expensive, 5 star hotel...

And then there was the holiday to Devon a few years later, when she was 17, and not only did she strop about being on the beach, but also about not being on the beach. To this day, I'm still not entirely sure what she wanted to do - maybe stand halfway between the beach and empty fields, all day, every day? Her brother, who was 9 on that holiday, had the worst migraine he's ever had for the first 4 days of our 7.5 day holiday, and I spent a vast portion of the time locked in a dark room with him, worried out of my mind as I was clung to, cried on, and puked over. We also spent a day in the local hospital's A&E department, because at one point the migraine shut my son's ability to not hallucinate/to recognise me as his mum. I got a speeding ticket that day, too, because of getting him to the local hospital...

Oh, and then there was the Disney holiday!!! My son was 8 at this point, my daughter 16, and she stropped because I took a photograph of them both with Mickey Mouse. For three whole days. Oh, and many tantrums were thrown by them both about the length of queues, the people who kept barging into us in the queues, the fact that my mother was there... and she was a nightmare, too, but that's not what this thread is about.

In short, I've refused to go on holiday with any of them since 2014. My daughter's now 22 and has the ability to go on long-haul holidays without me (yay!) - which she then does nothing but complain about to me, whilst she's there, via 'e'mail... and my 13 year old son is happier slumped somewhere at home, with the Wifi and his games console, following long lie-ins that sometimes result in his missing lunch. My mother's tried to entice me into taking both offspring on holiday with her and my father, a few times, but quite honestly? I think I'd end up murdering them all just so that I could get a few moments of peace and solitude... so I've always refused. This way, everyone gets what they want (which for me, is no one complaining about being somewhere that they don't want to be, when I've spent a small fortune paying for them to be there!)

And blimey, but that was cathartic!

sashh · 17/10/2018 08:57

As a teacher can I just say Jamaican Grannies are the best. If I ever have a child with a Jamaican Gran then one phone call and I get a sheepish apology and 'yes ma'am'.

I once had a child get quite angry at me, "Are you saying I'm dirty, I'll call my gran?"

"No I'm saying that sticking gum under a table and expecting someone else to remove it is dirty, if that's you then I'm happy to tell your gran"

Silence.

OP

I remember being on a holiday in France, I don't know what sparked my mum off but we (brother and I) were told to, "sit down, you will eat theis picnic, you will be quiet, you will enjoy yourselves because I say so"

northlaine · 17/10/2018 09:31

I get the ranting and moaning before we've even left the house. It's a battle to go anywhere as all 3 are convinced everything will be rubbish - drives me totally bonkers!!

My DCs want me to take them to USA next summer. DS1 (14) had an almighty strop yesterday when I said we were planning a trip to Hamleys/HardRock / London at the end of this H/T. (We've had an invitation to a "private shopping" thing - thought it might be quiet & therefore fun DD is 11 and DS2 is 6).

Before I had a chance to say either that Hamley’s and Hard Rock Cafe are just famous places you should check out at least once or even you can stay home and dog-sit if you don't want to come / you can go to Oxford Street that day while we look round Hamley’s etc etc, I got the full on "why would you think I would want to go to a TOY shop, blah blah, whinge whinge. It's not FAIR, I'm not 5, I'm NOT going - Are you STUPID?!! ".As if I was planning to take him for a day trip to the Entertainer!

I said "we are not going to USA next year because I'm not putting up with 3 weeks of this nonsense. If we go there you will get up, you will go out, you see some of the places we want to go to and you get to choose some too & you will try to appreciate the culture, the famous / iconic places and the food. Otherwise WHY would I spend fortunes taking you there?! Are you not going to go into FAO Schwartz because it is a "toy" shop, or Central Park because it's just some mud and trees?!? I am an adult and I don't want toys either but I can still appreciate the experience... you selfish little .... rant rant"

He piped down and apologised  maybe the tide is turning?!?! Please?!

timeandagain1 · 17/10/2018 09:43

During the summer we spent a week on a eurocamp place near Venice. We arranged to spend our last night in a hotel in Venice - so my DH and I could see a little culture whilst in the area. When we stepped of the boat in Venice I pointed out our hotel to my 12 year old DS (think authentic, crumbling Venetian style building directly on the grand canal). His response was "it looks like a dump, could we not have booked into a travelodge or premier Inn?" Grin

sashh · 17/10/2018 09:45

contrary13

I have a relative who, as a child, was always ill on holiday. From fainting onto my knee on the tube (he visited for a couple of days and didn't want to use the bus) to having his appendix out in an emergency op in France.

canyouhearthedrums · 17/10/2018 09:57

Wanted to just hang out in the hotel room, and play on the tablet. I was gutted

Sadly my dc's idea of holiday of a lifetime is to stay in a hotel room with high speed wifi and the Disney channel. And staying in said room doing said activities the duration of the holiday Hmm