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am i pregnant?oh wants abortion

23 replies

Hopefulcatt · 15/10/2018 20:32

So basically im 5 days late for period and i told my other half . he mentioned i might be pregnant,then started saying about if i am to get an abortion and if i didnt i was being selfish (and the thought of an abortion scares me ,but so does having a baby ). Ive been with him 4 years we both 19. I took a pregancy test on the second day i missed my period and it was negative
And i just want some help
Early prgnacy signs ?
What do i do with this whole situation ?
Advice ?
When can you take a pregancy test?

OP posts:
53rdWay · 15/10/2018 20:36

Pregnancy test would usually give an accurate result after you’re already late. So chances are that you’re not pregnant just late, but take another one anyway if still no period just to be sure.

Your partner sounds mean and unsupportive.

Kemer2018 · 15/10/2018 20:38

Get a test as we can't tell if you're pregnant. If easier, go to your sexual health clinic as they offer better hours and you're doctor needn't be involved.
Then you've got a clearer idea. All the best x

Jenala · 15/10/2018 20:38

Take another test with first wee of the morning. If it's still negative you are really unlikely to be pregnant and it's just your cycle being a bit random.

Kemer2018 · 15/10/2018 20:39

Your

sixnearlyseven · 15/10/2018 20:44

Was it a digital pregnancy test? They are less reliable in my experience, do a link line test like First Response early result.

WallisFrizz · 15/10/2018 20:45

You’re probably not pregnant if you are late and testing negative. However your partners reaction should make you question the relationship. There is nothing wrong with not wanting a child at 19 but it doesn’t mean he can’t be supportive whilst facing the consequences of both of your actions.

WeeMadArthur · 15/10/2018 20:58

Retest with another brand and rethink if he is really the one for you. I know you are both young and it was probably a shock to him but that was a horrible reaction to have to a partner of four years.

Hopefulcatt · 15/10/2018 21:01

Ive never ever been late for period but i keep little pains as if its going to come any minute but never does for the past few days ?

OP posts:
Dragongirl10 · 15/10/2018 21:06

Keep doing tests every couple of days....

Assuming you are not pregnant,
Treat this as a warning, sort out more reliable contraception/double up ie pill and condom.

Think carefully about your partner, he sounds horrible....

If you ARE pregnant, go to your GP without telling him, ask for guidance and talk to people who have YOUR best interests at heart, before making any decisions....good luck.

CocoLoco87 · 15/10/2018 21:08

Easier said than done but try not to stress as that can mess your cycle up. I was so desperate to get pregnant with DS2, that as soon as I was late I took a test. It was negative but I ended up being 11 days late for my period and did 7 negative pregnancy tests Blush

I would assume from what you've said, that you're just a bit late this month

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 15/10/2018 21:11

Well none of can tell you if you if you're pregnant or not. However what we can tell you is your OH is a cunt.
How dare he demand what you do with body. Telling you to get an abortion like its as easy as taking a dress back to a shop that you've spent too much on. How dare he want to force that type of trauma on you. How fuckin dare he.Angry
And Here's the kicker. He calls you selfish. I'd seriously be looking at your relationship wether you're pregnant or not.
He doesnt want a baby. He shouldn't have dipped his wick, bottom line.

Hopefulcatt · 16/10/2018 10:02

I took two clear blue tests both come back positive !
The question is what do i do now
How do i book a doctors appointment
I defo wanna keep the baby im to scared to have an abortion.

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 16/10/2018 10:04

How do you book a doctors appointment usually?

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 16/10/2018 10:06

Congratulations. Yes book in with your GP. Flowers

keepingbees · 16/10/2018 10:07

You just book a normal GP appointment, although they won't be able to do anything and will just tell you to book in with the midwife who usually sees you around the 8-10 week mark.
Hope you're ok, don't be pressured into anything.

PoesyCherish · 16/10/2018 10:11

Congratulations on your pregnancy Flowers

Your OH is being totally out of line. I almost had this when I was younger, where my period was late, we both thought I was pregnant but "D"P insisted on abortion. Thankfully I wasn't pregnant but I do understand partially we're you are at right now. You and your baby deserve so much more than some arsehole who wanted you to get rid.

Generally speaking if you phone your GP surgery and say your pregnant, they will advise on how to go about seeing the midwife.

Tootyfilou · 16/10/2018 10:21

Are you proceeding with the pregnancy because you want a baby or because you are frightened of a termination?
Try and separate these two things if you can. A termination at this very early stage could consist of just taking some pills. Contact your GP as soon as possible.
You are very young and have your whole life ahead of you. Hope you have some real life support.
You should choose what you want to do of course, but don't feel you have to proceed with the pregnancy if YOU choose not too.
Good Luck Flowers

TickleMyPickle · 16/10/2018 10:29

Why are you terrified of an abortion? How do you feel about becoming a mother?
I had an abortion at 18 ( my partner, also 18, made it very clear he didn’t want the baby) I was initially scared and ashamed to have a termination, however I didn’t feel ready to have the baby.
I was in a position to tell my mum, she would’ve supported my decision either way, and talking things through with her help me make the best choice for ME.
I’ve always been very maternal and feared it would be something I would never get over, But I can honestly say it’s been fine.
You have some time, don’t rush your decision and don’t let anyone tell you what to do.
I had my first child at 26 when I was in a happy, supportive and stable relationship and felt ready to be a mum.

TheCrowFromBelow · 16/10/2018 10:39

A child is a life long commitment and one that will tie you to this man for a very long time.

Do you have anyone IRL to talk to? This is huge decision particularly as your partner is not supportive. You need to look at all the options.

There isn’t a right or wrong decision in this either - you have to do what you feel is correct but please do talk to someone else you are close to as either way you will need support from someone.

WhoGivesADamnForAFlakeyBandit · 16/10/2018 10:39

I defo wanna keep the baby im to scared to have an abortion Having a termination at this stage is physically not more than pills and a very heavy period. Having an actual baby is a lot more scary. Emotionally obviously it's very different and it is totally your choice - just make it an informed choice you make without pressure from your OH.

SleepingStandingUp · 16/10/2018 10:45

OP you're still very early so no firm decisions need to be made.

Have you told DP you're def pregnant and want to have the baby?
Who do you live with and can you continue living there with a baby?
How would you cope with this baby on your own if DP left?
Do you want a baby or do you not want an abortion? What about adoption?

IJustLostTheGame · 16/10/2018 11:16

A termination early on isn't exactly pleasant but it isn't scary. I promise you. And it isn't invasive. Don't let that fear put you off, having a baby through fear is a bad idea.
If you want your baby because, well you want your baby, then congratulations.Flowers
And your OH is a dick.
Dump him what ever you decide.

toastedbeagle · 16/10/2018 17:39

You don't need to see the GP.

Normally you book directly in with the midwife. If you don't want to go ahead with the pregnancy, then you can self refer to NUPAS.

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