Where do you stand on cleaners? Extravagance or game changer?

[huggybear]

I've always thought of cleaners something for the rich and famous but now I'm finding myself fantasizing about having one.

Although we try and keep on top of things during the week I'm fed up of Friday night/Saturday being taken up with chores. I only live in a very small house though and I'm a little embarrassed that a cleaner might not think I 'deserve' their services.

Do you have one? Do you find it's made a big difference to your life? For context we are both out of the house from 7.30-6.30 and have no children or pets.

Everything in our house in terms of chores and parenting is split 50/50. A few years ago we just couldn't keep on top of the cleaning, tensions rose about who was doing what and we started arguing.

We decided to get cleaner in once a week and it's made a huge difference. I'd regard it as an essential (for us) and it's cheaper than a divorce.

Marriage saving. Less now than when we first employed cleaners - tiny children, long hours, me being clear I was compromising my career to be a mother not a cleaner.
I think you get used to them pretty quickly and if you think of it as a hard earned treat rather than extravagant, it’s easier to accept. For a small house the cost is less than a takeaway.

We had one for about 18 months, but I found it a bit stressful getting everything “ready” for her (tidying etc. to clear surfaces for more sensible use of her time) and when we stopped, mainly for budget reasons, I found it a massive relief. Things are admittedly a bit dirtier around here but it’s also more relaxing.

Anyway the main thing I hate is doing the toilets, and I still ended up doing them constantly when we had her, because once a week is not enough in this house

It reduces mental stress. I only need mine once every 2 weeks to keep on top of floors, tiles, skirting etc. 3 hours and she does some ironing too.
My home is completely clean when she leaves and it's easy to maintain.
Whereas if I did it at weekends, only 1 or 2 rooms would be tackled at a time. For the money, it's amazing value to have your weekend free and know that if surprise visitors call (or invited for that matter), the place is clean and presentable.
The best money you'll ever spend. I do pick up things before she comes, tidy clothes away and declutter generally to make the cleaning easier.

I have a cleaner for 2 hours a week, to do all the communal parts of the house. Dteens do their own rooms. It makes a huge difference to my life - I have to keep things tidy and avoids disagreements as my standards are higher than dh. Both work full time.

Thanks everyone that's commented so far. I will admit it does cause arguments in our house too so to take that out of the equation, or reduce it, would be great.

Would anyone mind giving me an idea of what can be covered in two hours? It's a small two bedroom - I'm thinking that should be enough for the basics and maybe changing the bed?

OP I was going to start the same thread! I'm also thinking of getting one, I'm sick of spending my evenings and weekends just trying to keep on top of the cleaning.

Game changer. I’m a single parent with 4 DCs and a dog. It’s not a luxury to me, but a sanity-saver. I do a lot around the house as it is, but it would tip me over the edge.

Why is it a luxury? It's just outsourcing so you can concentrate on other things. I'm a single parent running two businesses. It makes economic sense for me to employ someone else do to the cleaning than for me to spend 3 hours a week doing it (obviously I do the day to day stuff but cleaning floors and under beds, etc). It means I have more time for the kids and someone else gets a job out of it. Win all round.

Game changer here too! No more arguing and feeling resentful towards DH. DC actually tidy their rooms before she arrives without me having to nag repeatedly. Why feel guilty? Nobody feels guilty about other services designed for our convenience, so why the guilt about cleaners?! She does a much better job than me, and I help keep someone employed. Win win.

Firstly to having a cleaner. When we had our first I didn't work,preferring to do 'other things',ie meeting friends,reading and painting.Dina-the-Cleaner was thorough,enjoyed coming to us, and it gave her a much needed income.Win-win situation.
Now, years later, Sarah has come into my life. I'm disabled and actually need someone to do the essentials, but even if I wasn't, I'd have a cleaner.I like decorating,loathe cleaning. Sarah, like Dina,, actually enjoys cleaning....takes all sorts!
With both I've always paid generously.
Don't buy into women thinking they must justify their decision to employ someone.

I am really struggling with cleaning. Really, our house is chaos.

I am outnumbered

I'd like help, but, I'd feel judged...I should be able to cope with our own crap.

I know, I know, I know-

Marriage saving here too! It was causing arguments with us and now we know at least for a few hours before the kids ruin it, it is nice and clean.

I have had cleaners on and off for thirty years depending on what my work commitments have been like. Had my first one when I was only twenty two as I worked ridiculous long hours. I had one cleaner for six years, she was fabulous and I'm still in touch and go out for coffee with her occasionally.

I hate housework of any kind. I'm currently without a cleaner so I pay teenage DS to do a couple of hours a week. He is actually very good and extremely thorough.

I made sure to give them holiday pay. They never had to tidy up. The couple of times my DS had a messy bedroom I left a note saying he would do his own room once tidied and to leave it.

The cleaner I had for six years didn't give detail but she said some of her clients treated her badly. Making her wait for money or just leaving a dreadful mess for her to tidy before cleaning,

We had one when we had two kids and couldn't afford a car. Worth every penny

I know many people don’t have a penny spare but if both people are working I see it as an essential before wine, cigarettes, Netflix, etc. £10 each pet week. With both working it so often ends up being the woman taking on the lionshare of housework too. It’s the only way to redress that balance.

If you can afford it and both of your aren’t working I’d still consider it almost essential to earmark money for that, unless the SAHP purposefully gave up work to be a SAHCleaner. There’s more than enough to being a SAHP without all the cleaning relentlessly piling on top too.

I have 2 kids with complex needs and even though I am at home full time i have a cleaner once a week. I never stop as it is and do a coupled of hours of domestic stuff every day like mountains of washing, cooking and general cleaning as well. We do have quite a large house to keep on top of.
I felt so guilty at first and yes it is an expense I could do without but knowing that once a week it gets a good clean no matter what makes a massive difference esp if I am stuck in hosp with one of them. She is on hols for a month and I am looking forward to her return next week I can tell you. She is a lovely lady and has become a real friend. Win win all round !

I love my cleaner, we got her when I worked in London and dh was suffering from depression. She's seen us through 2 kids, a house move and my sons recent diagnosis. We trust her 100%. she tells us off occasionally when we get too messy but it's a delight to come home to a clean house.

I can see why two working people with a family hire a cleaner if they can- however I know single people in their 30s in flats who hire one and I do think u really can’t run round with a duster yourself on Saturday morning?

Game changer. 4 hours a week

Honestly it isn't a moral question. It is your family's money, do what you like.

In many countries it is considered bad manners for the middle classes not to hire help, as it spreads the wealth.

It is your life, your money. Don't let anyone make out this is a question of morals or ethics or being a good person. I mean, don't exploit anyone you hire, cleaners or gardeners or car mechanics, that's all.

Game changer here too. My mental health was suffering and I just couldn't keep on top of it all.

Two small children one adult DD, DH plus three dogs, two cats and 3 horses ( they live outside but there's a lot of hay involved! ) she does six hours we week ( on a Monday and Thursday ) split and that ensures we are clean and tidy, the bathrooms get done windows and mirrors ect. If I've left some dishes she does them and puts them in the table.

There's no routine she just comes in and looks around to see what needs doing. I literally don't know what I'd do without her, she's amazing and I can't tell you what an enormous difference it's made to all of our lives. DH works incredibly long hours and it's helped him feel more relaxed. I cut back on other stuff to employ her to help us, it's worth every penny.

I've often thought about this , but the thing is , I don't need a cleaner, I need a tidy upperer
I wouldn't mind cleaning if all the rest of the shite was done, I'd far rather come home to the house tidy and hoovered than than under the beds cleaned, I don't give a flying fuck what stoor is under the bed, it can quite happily stay there , couldn't really muster up any concern for the skirting boards either

A cleaner is an essential for us if we want our marriage to survive. We used to argue every weekend about it but no more :)