If your child was diagnosed with autism

[anxiousmotherof1]

What were they like at 11/12 months old ?
Am extremely worried about my baby boy as he has failed the asq communication and social test . I know is early but he is 11 months already so i dont rhink much can change in a month ? He does not point or wave bye bye he does not give me his toy or roll the ball back at me or anything like that
He aso does not initiate peekaboo but he will laugh when we do it
He is already walking he has eye contact but not when he is busy playing with somethin

Please try not to worry, babies all develop a different rates wether they are neruotypical or not. Diagnosing at such a young age is very very difficult. Although you could see it early in my son it wasnt diagnosed until 10 offically. If they have concerns they will watch him develop.
But let me say one thing, whatever the outcome that is still your boy he will be what he will be. And yes it means challanges ahead but i promise you will face it and become his biggest supporter. My son is now 17, and he struggles with fitting in and finding uis next path. Buthe is clever and funny. He has a unique take on the world , and i wouldnt have it any other way.

Dd was a quiet and serious child. She rarely laughed smiled or cried. She was very passive. She would sit doing nothing for hours. She had a few non typical words where, hair, square and go go go. Soon after her first birthday she lost all her words and was diagnosed with autism around her second birthday
Ds was a screamer, he screamed constantly. He had no words, he slept four hours in 24 at most and often a lot less. He spun wheels on toys and watched lights he didn't play with anything. He was diagnosed at two and a half.

Thank you both for replying! I am just so worried about him i love him so much and want him to have the best life possible .

What worries me is the way he plays and that he does not speak any word yet or follow simple
Instructions . He does hear 3 languages but i dont know if that matters

Children growing up in bilingual or multilingual homes often take a little longer to develop their speech and language skills, so I really wouldn't worry about that at this stage!

Children brought up multi lingual do speak later than those brought up with one language. He's still really young and still learning about the world about him.I'd advise to keep a note of any concerns and approach your GP if you are still worried in a couple of months.

Is actually three languages i speak to him in my language my husband in his and we speak together in english . I do undesntand how that would have an effect in the communication bit what what worried me
More is that he does not involve me in his play he is very foccused on a new toy and will get excited about it but wont try to show it to me .

The multi lingual situation will almost certainly be a factor. My friends son is exactly the same age as mine (both 3 now) and was brought up in a multi lingual situation. He was really 'behind' my son in loads of areas of communication for ages and she was worried. Now he has not only caught up but can speak three languages! The processing of different languages is a lot harder so can slow some things down while they concentrate on that.

FWIW also, my other son is 18 months and has only really been pointing or waving for a couple of months. He babbled but didn't say a single coherent word until literally last week when he hit out with daddy, car and ball on the same day! Things change very fast with babies and what you see them do is really a fraction of what they understand.

Do not worry.

@mistermagpie thank you for that . Did your friends son had trouble following commands as well as speaking if you remember ?

As hard as it is at 11 months I would try to relax and just enjoy your little boy.

I honestly can’t remember what ds was like at that age or if there where any “red flags”, by 3 I was pretty sure there was something. But he is still the same child, see how things develop.

But that's the thing OP, a lot can change in a month during the first year.

This was my daughter. She has just been discharged from Speech Therapy at almost six with no other concerns. She had a speech, language and communication delay and is now pretty much level with her peers. It’s so so hard when you’re going through it. Try not to think the worst right now

@Sirzy the wait and see approach is most definately the answer but am so anxious i cant help it !
@MrsCar i hope so he just doesnt see interested in minicking us or waving bye bye at the moment

You're right to keep an eye on it. A lot can change in a month so spend as much time as possible interacting with him, modelling what you are saying. Stick to OPOL.

I listened too much to the "every baby develops in their own time, wait and see" and now at 8 he is way behind the rest of his year group, speech therapy (also three languages), physiotherapy, the lot. He has made so much progress since he started, I really wish I had questioned what I was being told and was a bit more forceful when he was younger. When I think of the difference in him now, I also think how much it would have changed for him if I had been insistent when he was younger.

Please try not to worry too much at this stage. Babies literally change overnight at this age.

Most children don't speak their first word until 12 months onwards and lack of pointing is not a concern until after 18 months.

Am I right in thinking the ASQ for 11 months actually spans 11 months up to 12months + 30 days? If that's the case you still have plenty of time. Also begin the 'grey' section of it rather than the white isn't deemed failing. Being in the black is a bit more worrying but you baby still has lots of time to catch up.

I'm speaking as someone who has had dreadful anxiety about her son since he was born. He's 10 months now and finally some of that worry is lifting but I wish I hadn't lost so much time being so concerned.

@HeyJupiter i worry because he is in the black area of social and communication

I understand that and I don’t want to dismiss your concerns because that’s the worst feeling in the world. I will stress though that there is still time. Maybe re-do it (is it the 12 month one?) when he is 12months+30 days?

If you think he needs speech therapy then keep pushing for it. You can't harm him with speech therapy if he doesn't need it (but do bear in mind some are ill-informed about multilingualism, don't be persuaded to drop languages).

At 11 months DS would either spend days screaming in frustration where nothing could console him or hours rocking back and forth or head banging on the sofa. He didn't play or point. Was extremely serious and didn't really seek out company. Didn't point or wave and wasn't crawling.

My friends son couldn't (or didn't) follow commands until later, things like 'go and get that book' or whatever, which my son was doing. Like I say, her son is fine now. My own son has excellent communication skills but other emotional/behavioural problems, so communication is not the be all and end all.

I'm not sure what the ASQ is, if it's the thing the HV does at 12ish months then it didn't exist when my three year old was that age (my 18 month old had an assessment at 13 months) so these things weren't even on anybody's radar and you wouldn't have been worrying. My 18 month old didn't point and stuff at his but the HV wasn't concerned so neither was I. Really, try not to worry.

I won't say not to stress about it because no matter what anyone here says, you're going to stress about it. When you're worried about your child of course you're going to stress about it! You should speak to your HV, tell her your concerns, and get a professional perspective.

Are there any social skills based playgroups or classes in your area like Toddle Talk, Jo Jingles, Hartbeeps, etc? Sure Start (if there is one still in your area) sometimes do classes or group based around communication and social skills such as Five To Thrive or Learning Together Through Play. It could be worth looking into.

At 12-18mo DS was walking, could repeat words back to us, loved cuddles, climbing, and his dummy. He was, generally speaking, really happy and a lovely little boy. Looking back now there are a few things that stood out but we didn't think anything of until much later. He didn't play with toys. He liked toys and would give them a cursory once over but then they'd be abandoned and he would spend his time opening/closing doors, emptying/refilling the bookshelf, and turning the washing machine on/off. He hated loud noises, made plenty of them himself, but things like an ambulance going past with the siren going or a handdrier or street sweeper would have him sitting in the pushchair shrieking in terror with his hands on the sides of his head. He hated nappies, he wasn't ready for potty training as he didn't have awareness before he needed a wee/poo but as soon as he had done one in his nappy he would bring me a fresh nappy and lie down on the floor with his legs in the air, waiting, as if to say "get this thing off me!". When he did potty train,shortly after he turned two, he was reliably clean and dry within two days. He liked repetition, the same three nursery rhymes and actions over and over, if I sang them in a different order he would shake his head and cover my mouth until I sang them in the right order.

@HeyJupiter the questionaire is from 1- until 12 plus 30 days he will 11 months tomorrow . He was so advanced in motor skills crawling at 6 months so i never "had" to worry before
@GandolfBold hope tour little bou is doing better now
@mistermagpie thank you that is reassuring hope this is the case for my ds as well !

Is he interested in you? My ds was happier playing alone than with me at that age. He did burble a bit but not much. Please do not accept the bilingual kids develop slower argument. This was basically the reason why ds' diagnosis was delayed. He didnt say mummy until he was 3 and people still tried to tell me it was normal. If you google bilingual children the first thing that comes up is myths and the slower language development.

So he’s right at the beginning of the age range? That’s great as he has plenty of time (basically two months!) to catch up :) Often babies who are heavily focused on motor skills are a little slower with language and communication. I think if he’s still in the black section in two months have a chat with your health visitor but I doubt he will be :)

@redexpat he plays fine alone as long as am in the room if i leave he usually cires and crawls to me im the kitchen . He does like to play with me when i pretend that am lokking for him he is looking in anticipation waiting for me to "find him" and when i do he laughs and jumps. But he doesnt play with me using toys . He wont show me his car he will just play with it alone

@EwItsAHooman thanks for they info regarding play groups will look into those . He is starting nursery in a month too up until now its only been me with him and his dad