Approaching teacher not parent

[Mbear]

I want to speak to my son’s class teacher about some potential low level bullying that has just started. DS has spoken up quickly, at this point he’s not upset (although the says he’s a bit anxious about it). The boy is saying DS has girls hair - DS says that this boy has previously done this to another child who has now left the school - I don’t know if the 2 things are related.
My issue is that I kind of know the boys mum - they boys play on the same sports team. I think she would be pretty aghast if she knew her DS was doing this to my DS (but I don’t know that 100%). I can’t quite articulate why I don’t want to approach her and that I want to go straight to the teacher, and I don’t know what to say if she does approach me (and she might not).
I don’t know when name calling becomes bullying and when DS may need to learn to brush off some of it just because he doesn’t find it funny.
Both boys are 9.

I did put this in bullying section first, but got no replies

It does sound like something it might stand your son in good stead to deal with himself, if that's really all that's been said and he knows you have his back if it escalates.

It happened to my dc3 when he was still at preschool and he said "no I haven't, I've got my hair" but that's because he was 3 and took it at face value He did have long blond hair, which he liked and didn't want cut and as he was the first of my kids not to still only have wispy baby hair til school age I wasn't about to insist.

Let your son try and deal with it by rolling his eyes, ignoring or a smart comment. If it doesn't work have a quiet word with the teacher. It's very minor ATM but yes, the main thing is your son knows that he can tell you things and you'll listen and support him.

You definitely need to speak to teacher not parent. That’s the received wisdom on MN and has served me well.

Get it nipped in the bud now and you can all move forwards. Good luck.