Any practical tips to encourage a 2.5 year old to hold hands?

[Beyondtheshore]

Just that really. I have 2.5 year old twin boys, by and large fairly easy going and well behaved, quite behind with their communication though (not that uncommon with twins, but I think it’s part of the problem.) But they just WILL NOT hold my hand (or anyone else’s for that matter), and just generally don’t grasp the concept of walking in a set direction, staying on the pavement, etc. If I try to take their hand, they sit down and start to cry.

Reins don’t work. They don’t mind being put in them, but as soon as they realise they can’t actually go where they want, they (again) sit down and start to cry.

‘Hands or you go in the buggy’ doesn’t work, because they don’t mind the buggy one little bit. Problem is, I mind the buggy, because it’s big and heavy and it seems so ridiculous to have to get it out of the car to, for example, get 50 yards from the car park to the door of the soft play.

Threats or rewards don’t work - I think partly because they just don’t have the language comprehension to really understand them.

Does anyone have any practical suggestions of anything I could try? Should I just keep waiting for them to grow out of it? I can’t face the thought of lugging the pushchair around everywhere for such short distances when they’re 3 or 4. What would Supernanny suggest? Although I loathe Supernanny

Ach, carrying is a non starter, they’re super heavy, there are two of them, and they love being carried anyway!

I’ve ordered one of those wrist hold-ey things from Amazon... I’m not particularly optimistic but it’s got to be worth a try.

I’ll take up the communication thing again with the HV but they’re just so overworked. (I’ve tried unsuccessfully to arrange a hearing test, but that’s a whole other thread)

OP, sympathies. I am in the same situation but with a singleton.

The only thing that works for us is the Lifeventure backpacks with a 'lead' on the back. He is a refuser and a bolter...my stress levels are through the roof. With the backpack I can let him trot along next to me without wondering if he's going to bolt into the road or the stream or the duck pond. 🙄

Incidentally his speech and comprehension are both delayed and he has been referred for speech therapy as a result. If you think your twins aren't quite where they should be, speak to your HV.

Sorry just seen your latest comment re HV. Keep plugging away. Or try GP.

I always told my boys and nephews and nieces they had to hold my hand otherwise I'd get lost and I don't like getting lost.... They were so engrossed in the conversation about not letting me get lost we'd either be at our destination (park) or they be feeling so important they had a job to do they didn't even realise I'd succeeded lol

This was hands down the worst age with my twins. They listened just as much as any 2.5 year old but it looks worse when there's two of them (and they inevitably go in the other direction).

Wrist straps were a great help but there was a period when car parks really scared me.

My DS wouldn’t hold my hand so told him to hold my finger instead which he willingly did.

Some kids just don't like holding hands. I think for DS it was the feeling of being restricted - he is a jumper-refuser as well.

It’s uncomfortable for them, I used to have running battles with my DD about not holding my hand then I went on a training course and the woman had us all hold out hand above our heads for 25 minutes and it’s really uncomfortable and suddenly made sense!

I never thought of that Ex but it will explain why he's much happier holding hands now he's taller, too.