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Original poster

Look what DS did last night.

68 replies

LambShanksShabbaRanks · 27/09/2018 07:46

Context. DS was 4 in August and has been going through a major sleep regression since starting reception. He just wants to sleep/cuddle with me (we co-slept till he was 3, he's now in his own room and was fine with that for the first 9-10 months) and has been waking up 4/5 times a night (he doesn't do it at his dad's house).

I've been making him stay in/go back to his own bed and doing the slow retreat thing with minimal success.

Last night he woke once and I stayed with him till he went back over.

Then at 4am this morning I heard a weird noise, jumped out of bed, went to check on him and he wasn't in bed. Cue mad panic.

Ran back to my room and heard a soft snoring noise....

He had snuck upstairs and gone to sleep. Under my fucking bed 😢😱. It's simultaneously adorable and heartwrenching. I'm impressed at the wee bugger's ingenuity.

On a serious note, if anyone has any tips on how to get through this, that would be great.

Also, someone please send coffee 😴 .

OP posts:

endofthelinefinally · 27/09/2018 09:39

We used to have a spare duvet and pillows on the floor of our bedroom.
Any of the DC who felt a bit lonely could just come and sleep on that. It worked very well and everyone could sleep.

firstdegreehb · 27/09/2018 09:43

Oh my that's so sweet.

I know it's difficult and in an ideal world he'd sleep peacefully in his own room, but he seems to just want this mummy

Pinkgeorge · 27/09/2018 09:43

Make him s lovely little bed on your floor !! It won’t last forever

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60sname · 27/09/2018 09:44

Most adults prefer sharing a bed with their partners than sleeping on their own don't they?

I love DH dearly but much prefer sleeping by myself. Having a superking does help.

CoffeeShortbread · 27/09/2018 09:45

I’m impressed at how well hoovered the carpet under your bed is.

Paddley · 27/09/2018 09:47

Yes OP, where's the dust?

NightOwlHoney · 27/09/2018 09:47

Oh, he's a wee sausage. Bring him back into your bed and cuddle him. Soon he'll be big and he won't want to and believe me, these are the sweetest hugs you'll ever get.

Tinty · 27/09/2018 09:48

That is adorable, but just in case he does it again, can you please take the black (bin liners?) away from under your bed, or any other plastic bags under there. Just in case.

Yes, just make him a little bed in your room, it won't I hope be forever.

OoohAyyye · 27/09/2018 09:48

How adorable!

We co-slept with our 2 and 3.5 yr old until very recently. They share a room now but always join us in the night. As long as they start the night in their own beds then I'm happy and it allows me to stretch out in bed a bit... before I welcome them with open arms and we cosy up together.

AnotherShirtRuined · 27/09/2018 09:50

Stop listening to family members, friends, etc., and start listening to your own instincts. You know your own child best, and your DS obviously wants to be near you at night. So let him if it feels right for the both of you regardless of what other people say.

For what it's worth I still co-sleep with my children who are 5 and 7. Never expected to be a co-sleeper, it just never felt right to put a tiny human being in their own room while their dad and I snuggled up together. Both have the option to sleep in their own bedrooms should they so desire. So far they never have but we talk about it regularly.

Knittedfairies · 27/09/2018 09:55

I’m a firm believer that a problem with a solution is not a problem. Put him to sleep in his own bed, but let him climb in with you - literally don’t lose sleep over it. He won’t want to do it forever, even if it seems like it now.

Jent13c · 27/09/2018 09:58

I went back to work when my little boy was 9 months old (12hour shifts) and literally couldn’t wait until home time to be with him, even when he was fast asleep! I bough him a small double and sleep in there when he needs me, I do prefer my room to be my room (and maybe my husbands too )

Bluewidow · 27/09/2018 10:01

My son is 9 and after loosing his dad this year he comes and sleeps in my bed. Not ideal but if he needs that security then so be it. Let him in, soon he will be all big and won't want to be in same room as you let alone in the bed.

spinabifidamom · 27/09/2018 10:01

My son and daughter sleep with me sometimes if my partner is away.

They’re still so cute and little. But they’re not going to be this way always I remind myself frequently of that fact. My stepdaughter has her own bed in their room. She’s 4 nearly 5 so she wants her privacy now.

Whitegrenache · 27/09/2018 10:07

My 9 year old ds sleeps with me every night when dad is away with work during the week
My dd never slept with me as she prefers her own room

Honest I don't envisage my ds still being in my bed in a year or 2, so just enjoy it and snuggle in.
On the one occasion I had been away with work and ds couldn't sleep with me when I got back as dh was home- he made a makeshift bed and slept on the floor next to me!!
He's a mummy's boy

MiggledyHiggins · 27/09/2018 10:08

It's a big year for him as well if he's just started reception. Lots of new routine and new rules in his life and probably wants something familiar and secure - like mummy cuddles.

Give it another six months maybe before you try to sort out him sleeping in his own bed.

wanteddeadoralive18 · 27/09/2018 10:11

My Son slept with me for ages after i split up from his dad - he was about 8 when it started. I just let him as i thought he wont want to do it forever and eventually he moved himself back to his own bed and I was gutted!! He is 13 now :-) They are not little for long .... enjoy the snuggles!

BlingLoving · 27/09/2018 10:12

I agree that letting him sleep with you if that works for everyone is fine. Our problem is that DS won't go to sleep until I go to bed. So rather than fall asleep then come into the bed later, he just keeps himself awake until whatever time I come upstairs. We'd even let him sleep in our room from the start if necessary but we're in the loft and that scares him.

Raspberry10 · 27/09/2018 10:13

My daughter was like this at that age. We made up a little camp bed next to ours so if she felt the need, she could sleep next to us and not wake us up, but still feel close to us. She loved it.

Yokohamajojo · 27/09/2018 10:14

My DS2 got into bed with us most nights until he was 6-7. I can't remember when it stopped but all of a sudden he didn't come down anymore and it almost felt a bit sad even though he is a nightmare to sleep with like a plaster! wants to be on top of you if he could

So cute!

FaintyMcFainterton · 27/09/2018 10:14

My son slept in with me until he was 10. He was an anxious child who just needed the security and comfort of being close to me.

Cath2907 · 27/09/2018 10:15

My DD will be 8 in January and she would sleep in my bed every night if she could. She can't but when she is going through clingy phases I do allow a small mattress next to my bed. We also have "mummy bed night" where she is allowed to sleep in my bed - actually we go to bed at the same time for snuggles and a chit chat on that night. It seems to make up for the rest of the week when she has to sleep in her own room.
To be honest I am rather sad that this will probably soon come to an end. She is growing up and won't want to share my bed much longer I imagine.

GooseDownCreek · 27/09/2018 10:16

Oh just let him sleep with you. You'll both get sleep and I promise he won't be in there with you forever. DS2 slept with me until he was about 7.
Even after that he came in quite often,
I used to let him book a night in advance as something to look forward to.
He last slept with me when he was 10.

londonista · 27/09/2018 10:20

Oh bless him. I remember how hellish that stage was.
If it helps, I had a cheeky snuggle (forced!!) with my 10 year old, and I was telling him about how when he was 4 he was always sneaking in next to me and Daddy always marched him back, seemed to go on for ever.

He looked at me witheringly and said "gross" and got out of bed.

I dine out on those memories now, sadly that's all they are! Hang in there, everything's a phase isn't it.

Saffy101 · 27/09/2018 10:35

I thought I had "lost" my daughter the morning that she had curled up in a big lump of duvet at the bottom of the bed fast asleep, searched the house several times before finding her in a wild panic! She was 3!!!

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