What do I do about feeding DD1?

[KitKat1985]

Possibly I should post this in the special needs section, but those boards seem so quiet at the moment. DD1 is 4. She is under the special needs service and has delays in language, social skills, etc, and awaiting to see a paediatrician for an assessment for ASD (and from what is being fed back to me, will probably get a diagnosis of autism).

She has always being fussy with food, but the past few months dinners have gotten harder and harder. Lunches aren't too bad as she will eat ham or cheese sandwiches, fruit, cucumber / carrot sticks, raisins, cheese triangles, crisps, flapjacks etc. It's a bit repetitive but okay food. Dinners are harder though. She only will eat very plain food, and won't eat anything with sauce etc on. The only things I can cook for her that she will reliably eat are plain pizza (no toppings), chicken nuggets, fish fingers and sausages. The only side dishes she will normally eat with these are chips, carrots, green beans and cucumber sticks.

I've tried offering other foods like pasta dishes, curries, rice dishes, roast dinner etc but she won't eat them, no matter how much nagging or bribes I try. So essentially I either serve her the above options, or she doesn't eat.

Part of me wants to just give up now and just offer her what she will eat and part of me thinks I should just go with a 'eat it or go without approach'. To make it harder she has a younger sister (nearly 2) who is actually a very good eater and eats a wide variety of foods, but will get jealous and if her sister has fish fingers etc and she has something different, so they have to have the same meals really.

WWYD?

If she eats fries you could try popping in a few sweet potato fries or root vegetable fries (Strong Roots do them in the freezer section)

OP this is entirely normal for a child on the autistic spectrum. My advice is to re:post in the SEN topic.
My 14yo has aspergers and only eats about 5 things. Just the way he is. He is a complete sweet heart, has friends, enjoys life, goes to a grammar school, so I just ignore the food thing. He cooks his own now anyway!
Main thing is no pressure and don't try to 'trick' them in to eating stuff.

It looks like she eats a variety of food so feed her what she will eat but and don't let it become a battleground.

Yeah thank you. I'm tired of meals being a 'battle', but I'm plagued with parental guilt about her main meals mainly being pizza, fish fingers and chicken nuggets over 'proper' food. But I've kind of just resigned to the fact now that surely it's got to be better than just not eating at all?

I don't know how this would work with your schedules, nursery, childcare etc but is it an option to swap it around and give her main meal at lunchtime and then sandwiches in evening a few nights a week? Then you can have extra things for your youngest available and also it is more stressful in the evening when everyone is tired? Could it work?

Read the book 'George & Sam' by Charlotte Moore. Not only is it a good read but you'll feel much better about what your DD is eating. G & S are both on the spectrum and their eating makes your DD look adventurous.
And if it helps, fish fingers and pizza are featured quite a bit in my diet too! I was a picky eater as a child but I've improved a lot (I'm autistic) and I'll eat pasta, curry, chinese etc. But I do still like bland food For me it's all about the texture!

DS1 is autistic and fussy with food, but does eat a bigger variety than your DD. When he was diagnosed they did ask about his diet. Because, apart from potatoes, the only veg he eats is sweetcorn and carrots (steamed, he can tell the difference with boiling), I was expecting the consultant to be concerned about his diet, but because he will eat, they said to keep giving him the things he eats and if we have any concerns to get back in touch with them.

Basically, if he eats stuff from different food groups, he is fine to carry on as he is. He eats most meats, mashed potatoes, carrots, sweetcorn, pasta, rice, double gloucester cheese, tuna, strawberries, nectarines, cake, crisps, some salad veg, very little else.

Just feed DD what she eats, maybe offering other things when the rest of the family have them, she might eventually try them, over the years DS has added a couple of things to his list of likes (he now eats sausages, which he never used to). If you have any concerns about her diet you should have a medical professional involved in her care you can ask about her eating habits, if not you can ask your GP.

Also, at DSs previous school there was another autistic child who had a sausage roll every day for her lunch, one of the few things she ate, and the docs were ok with it as long as she ate it with a few bits and pieces like grapes, cucumber etc. They would have preferred a more varied diet and did introduce other foods in the evenings, but her diet was still very restricted. She was fit and healthy though.

My ds has autism and sever learning disabilities.
Don't worry too much about this, she is actually eating more variety than many kids I know with autism! Keep giving as much variety as you can but don't worry too much. Just give the best quality food that your dd will eat.
Have you tried plain pasta, pancakes?
Just keep offering and be thankful for the things she will eat.