Why am I so upset about a dead bird?!

[AngeloMysterioso]

Earlier this afternoon my DH and I got home to find an injured blue tit on our balcony. We tried to catch it but it sort of flapped off and fell through the gap in the corner and down into the garden below. So we went down and after a bit of a struggle (their garden isn’t really looked after and it had landed amongst dead rose plants and other stuff) we managed to catch it and put it in a little box which we’d put some kitchen roll and punched holes in. We took it to the vet round the corner and they promised to take care of it (they take in injured birds all the time). I rang back a little while ago to see how it was doing, and they said it had deteriorated and died earlier this evening.

I know it’s daft but I just feel so sad. I’ve actually cried a bit. I was just really rooting for the little guy.

What the hell is wrong with me?!

I suspect that it has triggered an upsetting memory in your subconscious, or possibly triggered a negative self-belief (e.g. you worry that you never get anything right).

You are upset because it's upsetting. It would upset me. You are empathetic Op that's all. I cry at stuff like this all the time. You are human is all.

I suspect you're sad because a life you tried to save has slipped away.

Some people might scoff and say it's just a bird, but it was still alive, still had fears and wants, still had the spark of life.

It is sad when that spark fades.

I remember as a child I tried to save a little robin but it didn't make it. Just thinking about him now, 30+ years later, makes me feel a twinge of sadness.

Don't feel bad for feeling bad.. be thankful you tried.

I would have been the same. It’s a sad thing.

I get this OP, i rescue any injured bird i find and am always sad if one dies.
It's great you tried to help it

It’s upsetting because seeing another creature in obvious distress is upsetting.

It’s upsetting because you hoped you could save it.

Quite normal. Poor little bird.

I remember finding an injured pigeon when I was a kid and walking 2 miles with it to the local vets. Receptionist laughed at first, but said that the vet would have a look at it. Pretty certain that they probably didn't.

I had this insane idea that the vets operated like the NHS (i.e. government funded with A&E staff)! Not sure what became of the pigeon.

Sorry to hear that your little blue tit didn't make it

I once found an injured seagull, took it to the car in my arms, then to the vet, holding in the whole time. It wasn’t too frightened, looked interested in the car, quite alert.
Didn’t make it... I was devastated.
Actually, none of the birds I have ever taken to vets have made it, which now makes me very suspicious (especially after reading on a thread here about how they just put stray cats down)... Whatever injured animal I’ll find next... I’ll try nursing it back to life. (Ok... don’t mean a cat or a dog ran over by car. But I’m so sure the seagull could have lived....)

*@Tika77 * likewise - every bird my parents and I nursed ended up coming back to health, but that one bird I took to the vets didn't. Makes me think that it's better not to take them to the vets at all!

It IS sad. Poor little thing.

Also, if you have other stuff going on, sometimes the smallest thing can be the last straw. Doesn't have to be big, serious stuff - sometimes you're just busy, and tired, and stressed, and it gets you down. Then a little thing happens that you'd normally shrug off, and 😭.

You did what you could though. More than many would have done.

Wild animals always looks so helpless and scared and we feel we can save them but we can't.
Their little systems get overwhelmed by panic as well and its just too much.
If its any consolation, I spent this afternoon proper crying cos the dog on The Kardashians died. Just don't say a word to anyone. So ashamed.

Thanks everyone. It’s true that I’ve got a lot on my plate as present (wanted to be TTC by now but can’t because of my thyroid, going to be unemployed at the end of the week, having a painful IBS flare up, oh and I’m on my period). I don’t know if it’s even that though. The poor little thing just seemed so frightened and helpless and it took me so long to catch it, but I was really hoping it would pull through. I gave it a name and everything.

Nothing is wrong with you! That's empathy. It sounds like you're a sensitive and compassionate person OP, that's something to be proud of.

The trouble is with wildlife and a lot of animals that are at the lower end of the food chain is that they are not designed to live when things go even slightly wrong with them. I have been directly involved in trying to save them as part of my day job and whilst I still don't stop trying I believe that because they are designed to be prey, they quickly go into a state where they die with little or no pain to themselves and in 99.9% of cases this is irreversible. It might not happen immediately but in the wild, the food, the temperature, the water content of the air, the pH of the food etc is strictly controlled by the animal and they seem to live in a very narrow 'goldilocks zone'. Outside the zone they can't survive. I believe this to be true even of large animals like beached whales etc. It all goes to pot the minute it goes wrong for them. I still try. We all still try. Don't give up trying.