How to stop children asking asking asking?!

[HoraceWimpIsThisYourLife]

I’m beyond the end of my tether with being constantly asked for stuff from my kids. Eldest child is the worst for it.
We had what would have been a lovely day out at a big event today but tbh it was spoilt by ds.
can I have an ice cream?
I’m hungry, when can I have an ice cream? Ooh I like that can I have it?
Why not?
You never get me anything!
I want an ice cream
Can I have one of them?
Look I’ve found this can I have it?
Can I have it?
Can I have it?
Can I have it?!
Aaaaarrrrgggghhh!

It’s not even just me, we had a family member with us who commented just how much he asks for, it’s literally every 30 seconds.
I’m not and have never been the sort of parent who gives in if they ask enough. If I say no I mean it.
I try and give a clear timeline of when said treat will be given so it’s not as if I’m being vague.

How do I turn him off? He’s driving me crazy!

One good tactic is to turn it round and get them to tell you the answer.
So "When can I have an ice-cream?" ( for the tenth time)
"Well you tell me. When did I say you could have an ice-cream?" They get fed up of having to keep giving the answer and stop asking.
Sometimes children do this, not because they are actually interested in the answer, but because keeping on asking things is their way of trying to maintain contact with you. If this is the case, some sort of redirect, where you are still chatting can work. With very little ones, it might just be about the things you can see around you. Older children can quite like making up stories where you take it in turns to introduce a character or say what is happening next. Or you could just ask questions about what the best bit of the week has been for them, what the funniest things is that happened in school this week etc.

If the icecream (or whatever) is coming I would say 'you will get it at x time, unless you mention it again between now and then, in which case you won't have it.'

Obviously that's for an older child- not a 3yo with no self-control.

If it's a small child, I sometimes think it's worth doing the thing they are going to obsess over first (start with the icecream) then it is done.

Does he have pocket money? We used to give it from a fairly early age for this very reason, so that we could say, yes you can have it but you need to use your own money. Seemed to do the trick!

'if you ask again the answer will be no/ never'

Gag em.

Try ignoring all the 'can I have it' requests

Agree trying it round 'when did I say you could have and icecream'

Set up expectations before you go - 'The park is costing X and I can't afford any further treats, we will have a picnic at 12 and ice cream at 3'

If you ask for things we won't go to the park again -

Oh I hear you, my youngest is autistic and doesn’t understand timescales or why nots.
Our OT gave us some fab advice regarding toys/bigger things she asks for. We take a picture of dd holding it and add it to her ‘list’. Then when she has enough pocket money, or done something really well (hospital procedures etc) or birthdays and Christmas, the she or we can refer to the ‘list’. I think her knowing that we haven’t forgotten and taken an interest really helps her, but like I say she had asd so not sure how helpful that will be to a Nt child?
With her, explaining why not now, or distractions work best.
With the older dc i would say that if they kept asking they wouldn’t get anything, or gave them realistic timescales ie you can have an ice cream once the picnic is finished and we walk past x bench or something similar. Or asking questions back ‘why do you think you’re not allowed it’ ‘when do you think we will be able to’

How old? If my 4 year old keeps asking for something (eg ice cream on a day trip) we set a timer on my phone which then goes in my bag. IF he’s good, and IF he stops whining / asking for ice cream.. we go for ice cream when he hears the timer. Works quite well (and actually he’s often forgetten the thing he wanted by the time the timer goes off)