Partner with health anxiety

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Does anyone else have a partner with health anxiety? Dh has some chronic health problems including some that are also caused by anxiety and I am not sure how to help him.

He’s been having sleeping problems and last night I said ‘I hope you sleep better tonight.’ But that gave him a panic attack and he had another dreadful night. I’m too scared to speak to him now in case I make things worse!

I want to help but am also exhausted from working/ childcare etc (his health problems means he can’t work or do much.) He is googling operations he thinks he needs and wants to pay for them privately. I am very worried about money atm so I know I should talk to him about all this but just can’t being myself to in case we argue and I make everything worse again.

He’s not lazy. He’s wonderful and is really suffering. I want him to get back to being himself, but I’m also scared of wanting that because maybe this is how he has to be for a while

Sorry this is so unstructured. Does anyone have any similar experience?

It is really hard being the partner of someone with mental health issues. Just keeping everything else going while supporting them is really difficult. Is he getting help for his anxiety, it is obviously affecting his life and yours.

He doesn’t have gp support but we have worked out a plan that involves exercise, healthy esting, etc. I’ve suggested therapy but he’s resistant. Instead I go to therapy to talk about him!

I am very willing to accept my role in this- as facilitator or as someone who makes it wors. But I just don’t know what to do to help.

This sounds very hard on you OP. He really does need to seek help from a medical professional. Anxiety is an illness and it can be treated. If he had diabetes but was “resistant” to getting insulin from a doctor and you had to deal with him passing out all the time with blood sugar issues you would surely say that was horribly unfair?? This is no different in my eyes.

Talking therapy, CBT and sometimes a short course of medication can be life changing for someone with anxiety.

He needs to seek help.

I was the one with health anxiety. Bloody horrible but I feel a lot of guilt over my now husband having to work, pick up the slack with housework and our daughter, and also dealing with my issues. Thankfully I saw a great GP who referred me to an Occupational Therapist for some CBT. It’ll never go away without help.