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Tips for dealing with a workplace bully?

2 replies

Troyes76 · 20/09/2018 21:15

I’ve come to the realisation today that I’m being bullied at work.
It’s very subtle, and it’s taken me a long while to realise that the problem is them and not me.

When this person has reviewed my work they have always been incredibly negative and critical, even questioning my commitment and professionalism.

I’ve been doing the same type of jobs for years, and have never received anything so negative and critical in hundreds of other reviews from others. In appraisals my line managers always speak highly of my professionalism and commitment.

I’m not assertive, and let the first few instances of this slip. I also have anxiety so am always first to blame myself and feel guilty if I am criticised. I didn’t tell anyone about these criticisms (one included the verbal threat of a disciplinary although there is no evidence in writing of this). I did mention one instance to my line manager, who said just to ignore it, not to let one bad review cloud the fact that I was excellent at my job etc.

Today I received yet another negative and critical review, this one containing some factual inaccuracies and again questioning my ability to do my job. I think the expectation was that I would keep quiet as I have done previously.

But today I went to my union, formulated a response outline the inaccuracies (and downright lies) and providing evidence to show the contrary. The union have delivered it to the person in question and my line manager. And I feel so much better for having stood up for myself. Instead of sitting here feeling bad, questioning my abilities and feeling helpless, I can go into work tomorrow with my head held high.

But what now? I’m hoping they’ll just stop, but what if they don’t. Does anyone have some strategies that I could use to make sure I keep standing up for myself?

Thanks for reading if you’ve got this far!

OP posts:
MistressDeeCee · 21/09/2018 04:20

On Monday ring ACAS free advice helpline 0300 123 1100. Line opens 8am. They'll advise you so you have a clearer idea of what your options are re workplace bullying.

Lots of good info and factsheets on their website also

www.acas.org.uk

AnalUnicorn · 21/09/2018 05:58

You took a great first step in responding formally rejecting their unwarranted criticism. With any luck it will show the bully that you won’t put up with their shit and they will leave you alone.

If not I would escalate again to your line manager and tell them that you’re not prepared to just “ignore it”.

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