Friends met through the kids never last long

[Medwaymumoffour]

I have four children, so I have meet a few people via them over the years. Some have been close for a while. But as soon as the kids stop having things in common those friendships stop quite abruptly. They don’t fizzle out, I just seem to be gousted.

So for example I had a close friend or two with each child, going round their house, play dates, but also going out without kids for meals and drinks without the kids in the evening. So I thought the mums liked me , not just the play date aspect.

Recently the last straw is a Mum I was Close too for three years suddenly not replying to my WhatsApp as soon as her dd started school. I guess I feel hurt this time as I had been quite comfortable with her and told her things about my life I haven’t with friends before. She reads the messages then ignores me. I have stopped messaging her as I feel like a stalker after four ignored messages spaced out over a month.

I have friends not met via the kids who are great, but as you get older it’s it harder to make friends.

I don’t feel now like I want to make friends with other parent s anymore. Just enjoy their company in group situations and surface level polite chit chat.

I guess I’m wondering if it’s normal for these friendships to never last or is it me?

Hi, this happened to me as well, I guess it must be normal! We moved out of the area, not far only about 25 minutes drive. We've had lovely group of friends there and try to make effort to see them. They don't seem to want to make the same effort to keep in touch as it is clear now our children won't go to the same school.
Although there is this: she might be going through something you don't know about and finds it difficult to see people. Or really busy with the start of school etc. Either way, try to relax about it. If she really is a friend she will come back and apologise for absence, and if not, unfortunately you will just have to let go. I hope that helps
This sort of thing happened to me on many occasions specifically with mum friends, so I guess I try not to get attached in the first place

Some have lasted. My two close friends who I socialise most with were people I met through the DCs. With one of them, our DS's made friends in nursery so we would chat and got to know each other. The boys went their separate ways (constantly falling out!) and we stayed friends. The boys are 14 now and at the same school and friendly enough, though they don't spend much time together. My friend and I see each other a couple of times a week and message most days.

She just comes across as rude. I mean at least answer a message and say something like you are busy or tight for money.