Have you gone from being very well off to not?

[raspberryrippled]

DH and I have a very comfortable lifestyle- big house, no mortgage, lovely LH holidays, DCs at uni etc.

But I think our circumstances are going to change dramatically. DH is possibly going to be made redundant. He's early 50s and tbh is burnt out.
I feel that if we're really careful he could retire now but our standard of living would drop enormously but that we could adapt.
I will carry on working in my rewarding but not well paid job.

We really don't lead a flashy lifestyle apart from the holidays. DH disagrees and thinks we'll struggle.

I suppose what I'm asking is for other people's experiences.

No mortgage = keep big house.

He will be able to get a job doing something more worthwhile, that will allow him to live longer, and make better choices about what he buys. Your environmental footprint will reduce.

But here is the biggest secret yet - you don't need lots of money to have fabulous foreign holidays.

We both retired unexpectedly within a few months of each other. Went down to one car and cut our cloth accordingly. It's absolutely fine - we often joke that we can't think what on earth we used to spend all that money on. Yes, life is simpler but infinitely more pleasant. Like your husband, mine was very stressed and I was so relieved when he retired. We do both have occupational pensions which fill the gap before state pensions kick in, savings and are mortgage free which does make a difference. Still have the odd holiday, and lunches out and takeaways. I still treat myself to clothes too, but obviously don't need to buy the expensive corporate type stuff any more - if you can, encourage him to go for it - it's totally liberating. Life is so short.

You have assets though because your money is tied up in the house. If you were to downsize then you would release some capital.

Thank you for the replies.
DH would love a less stressful job, he has a passion for the countryside and lots of skills that he could use.
I suppose that the idea of living more frugally as opposed to the reality is the scary thing. We do grow a lot of fruit and veg but then spend a bomb with Ocado.
We don't eat out that often but when we do it's somewhere very expensive.

I'm hoping like Daphne that we'll wonder what we spent our cash on.

Reduce your costs now and that will help you to adjust, plus giving you a small savings buffer.

My DH is a high earner, but we are fairly careful with our spending. Perhaps it’s a habit we can’t get out of!

Are you helping out your dcs financially? Because when that stops, believe me, it makes a huge difference. Dh (late 50s) is on a quarter of what he was ten years ago, but has a much more rewarding job, and we are happier.

Could you sell the house and downsize ?

Just a thought - why doesn't he take the initiative and go back to his company and offer to do 2 or 3 days a week on reduced pay. Transition down a bit.

Finding ways of saving money and bargains can be quite psychologically rewarding. You say you spend a lot eating out. There are a load of great places that don’t cost a lot. We went to IKEA yesterday . In the canteen my son had a lasagne, me and dh had meatballs chips and gravy, Salad,dessert drinks and coffee all for just £18.

I left a reasonably paid job to go back to college and live off student loans and parttime work for a few years. It's amazing how quickly you'll adapt. Just try to do as much of the math before hand and make sure you have a buffer, because there are always surprise costs.

You mentioned that your husband is handy and that could work enormously to your advantage in saving money and doing a lot of your own home repairs. 50 is not very old, unless you have health problems. So if you are not averse to living in the country you could both have a fabulous life there while also being frugal.

Not having children in the house also means that you might be a lot more comfortable if you downsized. Smaller living also means lower heating and maintenance costs.

Me!
Life goes on, but not in the way you wanted or expected. You face your reality and get on with it.

Downsize and free up cash if possible.

We've worked out what we'd actually need as opposed to what we currently spend on. It's an interesting exercise! We'll be doing it over a period, whilst putting DDs through their PhDs so that's where the £ will be going, and I've realised it'll actually free up life. Really looking forward to it.