Leaving baby/toddler for the first time

[Sunflower789]

Hi all,

My little one is coming up on one year old and I have been putting off leaving her with anyone as I feel so nervous about it.

My husband bought tickets for a night out together in a couple of months and I'm already worrying. Where we are living we don't have any family near by so it would have to be a babysitter. I feel like I wouldn't be able to enjoy myself and would be worrying if I went out, but also see his point of view that some time out together would be good.

Can anyone offer any opinions/experiences if you are or have been in the same situation please?

No advice! I chickened out yesterday and ended up losing £180 on Arctic Monkeys tickets because I didn’t want to leave her 🙈

I was the same with DD (shes now 6) took me ages. I would either chicken out or take her 🙈 best advice i can give is get a sitter to come meet you & LO, if they're decent they will be happy to. Then if you can afford it, get her to come once a week, even for half hour, so LO gets to know her. Hell sit in the car down the road if you want. It probably sounds nuts but it works. Check the sitter can do the day you need for your night out, then build up a relationship. Works a treat.

DS is 11 weeks & i left him at 4 weeks to go training...i felt guilty as hell but this time no anxiety

Can you try to pick out exactly what about leaving her will worry you. Then you can try to rationalize each point to reassure yourself that she will be fine.

Do you use any childcare or are you planning to? Many nurseries will have staff who want to do evenings (more expensive than a teenager but DBS checked and used to babies).

I've not thought about nurseries AJ thanks, only babysitter sites online. I will see what's local.

Its mostly the leaving her with a stranger, the guilt of the walking out of the door part and her wondering where we are, I'm worried about.

I think the half hour thing sounds like a good idea dotcom. I haven't taken the first steps towards that as I just have the fear about it 😕 maybe if I'd have done it before now it would've been easier, but I've been putting off leaving her.

What age is your LO mummyshark and will you try again soon? I did the same at 3 months and now haven't tried again since😯

Book a sitter from a reputable agency/nursery/someone a friend has used and as PP said just sit in the car with a coffee or go to a cafe on your street if you have one. It’ll get easier.