What advice would you give to your 40 year old self

[Missedmoments]

Was just reading the elderly parents board. I’m strangely drawn to it despite the fact that my own parents are in good health and living very productive lives Some people are in fairly bad shape physically & mentally as they enter the golden years. Just wondered if anybody in their 60’s/ 70’s or even 80’s look back now and wish they had done something different in their 40’s ?

I like this thread.

I'm 42 in a few weeks. I gave found myself less assertive and confident these last couple of years compared to my 30s and 20s. I hope I re-find it. I do wonder what pep talk older me would give me now.

Totally place marking. I’m almost 38 & DH is 42 (& recently diagnosed with cancer) so we have already started looking at life a bit differently.

I’ve always been one to use the ‘best’ plates/cutlery/glasses etc on a daily basis. But any other advice about living in the moment, making the most of every day etc is welcome also little tips - like it is definitely worth using that eye cream or not stressing about a few wrinkle here & there would be great to know.

We keep getting told we can't do things alone, but we can. Don't settle in a bad relationship, get out, believe me we are all stronger than we think.

10 years ago, I wouldn't have believe anyone who told me I could manage as a single parent. But I can, I've simply had to be more organised (spreadsheets help).

Keep things in perspective - Don't worry about it for too long unless you will worry about it on your death bed.

Bump

Divorce your husband and get living before the menopause hits.

Oh and don't go within a million miles of a teaching career!!

The only way is down...

expect a massive upheaval towards the end of your 40s as your body and spirit readjusts. So love that still young body (you'll love that new older body too), show it off, take pleasure in its strength and agility. (I didn't do this enough). And do stuff with your parents now - as they get old very quickly.

Keep up with IT otherwise at 60 you'll be completely unable to work a computer or whatever we have by then. ( I did this but have friends who didnot and who take forever to do simple tech things).

Learn how to do some basic practical things if you don't already know. Even if your happily living with someone who does the car maintenance, puts up shelves, unblocks the bog and sorts out leaks, one day, they wont be there.

One day, you'll realise you are invisible, so start practising NOW not measuring your worth by how you look.

Buy those shoes - your feet won't want to wear them when you're fifty four (me)

If you have DCs it is amazing when they leave home and you rediscover your own self. You are in there, under the mum costume.

Don't stop reading - or your power of concentration will shrivel to a quick swipe of FB.

Get off FB!

What a truly great post @buckingfrolicks

Turned 40 yesterday.

Bucking that’s a super post I often think about the things my DH looks after that I would struggle with if he wasn’t here.
I’m going to make a list of things I need to get on top of. I really need to get more active aswell. I’m just not doing enough. So much to think about !!

Hang in there - its going to get worse but the it will ztart to look up

FATEdestiny it does get better!
I'd say after 50 you start caring less about what people think of you, that and the whole 'invisible' tag is incredibly liberating
I look at things in a very different way, i find myself saying what i want to say instead of worrying about making a fool of myself.

I'd tell my 40 year old self to not take older relatives for granted, find out about who they are as people, and everything they know about their parents and grandparents.. One day they will no longer be here and all those questions will never be answered..