Can I ditch the prewedding party and enjoy my hotel room instead?

[EachandEveryone]

It would be mean wouldn’t it? And it was my birthday yesterday I did nothing as it’s my best friends wedding on Saturday. There’s a party tonight. I was looking forward to indulging myself and going to bed at 10 in peace. How totally selfish is this???

I would!

Pre-wedding party? Whatever next. I can understand a quick drink with friends the night before if you havn't seen each other for a while but honestly. You do whatever works for you.

How big is the party? If its a small group and she is your best friend then really you ought to try and go. If its a large group and all her family are there etc then it might be okay to give it a miss seeing as you are going to the wedding tomorrow so will be supporting her there....
Will she really be at that party very long herself considering shes getting married the next day anyway?? wont she need to get some sleep? Maybe she would also be going to bed at 10 so you could just leave when she does.

I’m not sure why you can’t celebrate your birthday, just because your mate is getting married later that week?

If you are a part of the wedding (bridesmaid, etc) or your friend would be hurt about you skipping it, I think you have to attend. Good thing about parties is that once you’ve said ‘hi’ all round, and offered to help with something (hand around nibbles) hardly anyone gets offended if you then duck off early.

I know well the lure of the hotel room (especially if there’s a bath & fluffy bathrobe). But if people you care about have gone to effort and expense, and you’ve rsvp’d then pull the frock on and make the best of it.

Are you falling prey to JOMO (joy of missing out)? The fab feeling of blowing off your plans in favour of a screen, snacks & sofa? Save it for more casual nights out.

Well it’s a wedding on a tight budget so it’s not one of those American rehearsal dinners. It’s basically an open house for the family that have travelled. It’s in my town but I booked the hotel as it was really cheap tonight. I did the hen weekend last weekend and tomorrow is basically good music and booze very informal —but I still need my beauty sleep—

When you are now past 50 and have been off sick for ages months birthday celebrations can be delayed!

Pop in for half an hour early evening, then leave saying you want to be fresh for the big day tomorrow.
It's ironic because you pay for this lovely hotel room at weddings and then you're literally in it for about 7 hours. I was glad at Dnephews wedding to have an excuse to slope off early and enjoy the selection of herbal teas and cookies with DS ( it was a very expensive room).

The key to leaving a party early but no one be aware is to be seen by everyone and to get or at least offer the bride a drink (probably a soft one so she doesn’t get a bad head).

So that requires professional level mingling, don’t stay with anyone too long but have good chats with everyone or at least the key people. Then you just ghost.

You don’t say anything to anyone, you just simply slip out.
No one will be sure what time you left and it’s assumed it was when everyone was drunk therefore late

I got to the hotel quite late and most of the party where in the bar. I had a couple of drinks then I unpacked and realised I’d left my make up bag at home. Bloody karma.

Go for it. We had an informal meal out the night before our wedding and about 16 people came. Was all over by 10. Fine by me!