So fed up with ExH

[PanicAtTheCostco]

Today he was supposed to come get the kids shoes/coats for school with me. He doesn't do anything for them practically speaking.

I rang him at 11am as we agreed to leave at 12.
He was still in bed (he sleeps ALL day) and said he was getting up.

12 noon and kids are sat in garden waiting and I call him again
He's still in bed.
I shouted at him and he told me to fuck off and hung up.

He's given me £100 towards uniform for 4 kids.

And now tonight, DS who is 7 has a fever of 39.2
I text ExH and asked him if he would get some Nurofen from the shop next to him as I had been to my local and they had non.

He said no and told me to walk to the next nearest shop.

I'm so sick of him. I don't want anything to do with him anymore.
I feel like the kids are better off without him. They never want to go his, the youngest even cries.
He's a complete selfish arsehole

I just need to vent :(

So why do they have to go to his? They don't want to and he sounds as though he can't be arsed with anyone other than himself.

Why are you going clothes shopping together? This is not necessary.
If he is paying proper maintenance you can just go shopping yourself to get the uniform/clothes. Does he pay maintenance?

Well that's what I'm thinking. They don't. I've tried to keep things positive and them in his life but he just keeps letting us down.

Sorry but since exH and I split we have never gone shopping together or anything of the sort. I also couldn’t and wouldn’t expect him to pop to the shop for me . Furthermore, I get nothing extra towards school uniform... This is the reality for most separated parents I would say.

He doesn't pay maintaince. He's not working so no point. It would be pennies.

He was coming with me because I can't navigate large shops alone. Everything else has been bought online but shoes need to be tried on.

Last year he took one DS and bought shoes 3 SIZES too big so I can't ask him to go with them alone. He's an idiot.

He sounds appalling! Why does he sleep all day, does he work at night or is he depressed?

If he's not ill he's just a horrible man. If you can manage without him, please do.

I'm on ESA for illness so unfortunately I do need to call on him for help sometimes when it's in relation to HIS children.

You know he’s unreliable so you’d be better off detaching from him and not asking him for anything.

Were you able to sort the shopping without him in the end? If so then you didn’t need him to help you in the shops and it sounds like it was more hassle than it was worth trying to go with him.

You’d had an argument earlier in the day so I’m not surprised he didn’t want to go to the shops for you. Yes it would be nice for him to help his poorly child but equally he might say their care including access to suitable medication is your responsibility when they’re with you.

Would you run an errand for him when they’re in his care?

I’m sure he is an idiot, vent away! But trying to lean on him isn’t helping as you’re going to continually be let down.

Yes of course I would do him a favour when he has them and have many times.

No I haven't sorted the shoes. I don't know what I will do, I guess I'll have to order some online and pray they fit.

He is an arsehole. Commiserations. Presumably if he wasn't such a shit you might still be together. However the reality is you are separated and he can't be relied on. I know it's crap but you need to find someone else to help you out.

I'm sorry but I don't understand people agreeing with him not going to the shop. If your kid is sick you try and make them better, irregardless of if your getting on with the other parent or not. Id never let my child suffer because I'd had an argument with a partner/ ex partner, whatever. The child needed medicine. For a parent not to provide that medicine when they were perfectly capable of doing so easily is cruel