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Original poster

If you’ve had a tubal ligation, how old were you and how hard did you have to fight?

17 replies

BlairWaldorfsHeadband · 27/08/2018 16:24

I’m considering asking for them to do this when they do my cesarean for the birth of my twins:

My reasons for wanting this are

  • I will have three children, which is the number I wanted
  • I am tokophobic and pregnancy makes my anxiety worse
  • I take a medication that I ant take during pregnancy and don’t want to worry about the risk of accidental pregnancy
  • I have sticky blood, and any accidental pregnancy I don’t notice will likely end in a miscarriage (I have had three) which would be traumatic.
  • hormonal contraception causes my anxiety to worsen
  • I don’t agree with abortion (for me, I’m not bothered what others do) so that wouldn’t be an option if I did get pregnant
  • I conceive very easily. All my pregnancies were conceived on first or second go, so it would be likely that if I had a slip up, I could become pregnant (and possibly miscarry, again)
  • I get HG and severe pain when pregnant and I don’t want to go through another pregnancy when it will mean I can’t look after the kids I’ve already got.

To me these are all very sensible reasons for wanting it. However, I’m 24. From what I’ve heard, the NHS won’t even consider doing this when you’re under 30.

Can anyone share their own experience? And whether they would recommend it?

Thank you.

OP posts:
WouldLoveAHoliday · 27/08/2018 16:47

I had one at 29.

It was actually decided during the C section birth of my 3rd baby. I’d had 3 very difficult pregnancies and my first child died at 9 days. My consultant found my uterus was paper thin & adviced strongly against any future pregnancies. So we decided to go ahead there and then.

bangourvillagebesttimeever · 27/08/2018 16:52

At aged 24 you will have no idea what your future holds. My sister had three DC by the age of 21 and ended up breaking up with her partner. She ended up meeting someone else in her 30s and had another DC at aged 37. I had my tubes done after my c section however I had 4DC, got pregnant far too easily but I was 44 and didn’t want to keep taking contraception when I had definitely finished having DC. Really take some time to think about this.

Original poster
BlairWaldorfsHeadband · 27/08/2018 16:56

WouldLoveAHoliday

Flowers I’m so sorry to hear about your DC Flowers

OP posts:
Original poster
BlairWaldorfsHeadband · 27/08/2018 17:00

Bang

While it’s true that anything could happen, I can’t see me wanting to go through with another pregnancy.

My first pregnancy was stressful due to HG and due to repeated attempts by my body to go into premature labour, my son was born blue and nearly died in the end. Luckily he is okay now.

My second, third and fourth pregnancies ended in miscarriages, two of which required surgery for and which was honestly the worst thing I have ever been though and almost broke me mentally.

My fifth pregnancy, this one, is my current pregnancy. It’s a twin pregnancy and I’ve had HG, and now have severe ligament pain. I have to inject myself with clexane.

Each pregnancy is horrendous for my mental health, I have horrible panic attacks and constantly am afraid of either dying or something happening to the babies.

Doing this after my three feels like quitting while I’m ahead to me. I feel lucky to have the children I have. DC1 is also autistic and is very difficult to handle while I am feeling so ill.

OP posts:
IHaveBrilloHair · 27/08/2018 17:02

I was 30, single, with just one child, didn't have to fight hard.

NicoAndTheNiners · 27/08/2018 17:06

I was 28, one child, didn’t have to fight at all but it was a while ago.

They’ve got stricter now and especially if you have a DP they will often try and say he should have a vasectomy instead....less invasive and cheaper for the nhs.

Original poster
BlairWaldorfsHeadband · 27/08/2018 17:09

I do have a DP. Wouldn’t it be cheaper to do it while I’m having the ELCS as they’re already in there?

OP posts:
bangourvillagebesttimeever · 27/08/2018 20:46

I have lost many babies too. I had a two miscarriages, two missed miscarriages one at 22 weeks, an ectopic too . So I understand and was terrified with all my pregnancies after that, however sterilisation is a big decision at aged 24. I had my first DC at aged 25 and my next wasn't until aged 34 with another partner. I regularly told people I didn't want any more DC prior to that and was quite clear that's it for me . I still think you need to take time to think about it. I should also add that the tubal ligation after a C section was quite unpleasant..it delayed my ability just to spend time with my new baby. I felt every bloody thing with them pulling out my uterus and it affected my recovery. It can be done at a later date. You have no idea how you will feel once you have your new babies. And your partner can always get the snip

NoWordForFluffy · 27/08/2018 20:49

I was asked if I wanted it during my ELCS, without even prompting them. I didn't have it, but I think you'll find they'll happily do it then for you.

ZeroFuchsGiven · 27/08/2018 20:53

I had it when I was 25. I asked for it during my 3rd c section and they refused. However, I had serious problems afterwards and had to be rushed back to theatre 2 weeks after my c section, I remember they did it then and they did with no arguments.

Phillipa12 · 27/08/2018 20:53

I had one during my 4th section, no problems but then i was 40 and obviously was on my 4th section. Did find pain afterwards more difficult to manage esp in the first week.

ZeroFuchsGiven · 27/08/2018 20:53

Demanded* not remembered.

noeffingidea · 27/08/2018 20:54

Had mine 18 years ago when I was 40, a few months after the birth of my 3rd child. My consultant said yes straight away.

NicoAndTheNiners · 27/08/2018 20:59

Yes if you’re having a section they’ll probably do it happily. However make sure you discuss it and have it documented prior to the section day. I’ve seen people assume they can have it done on section day and not mention it prior to the day and the surgeon refuses as guidelines say that women should be counselled on the procedure and then have some time between counselling and the procedure so they can rethink if they want to.

BuzzOff · 27/08/2018 21:01

At the age of 41 at the same time as my 5th c/section, the only thing I found was that my periods have been a lot heavier since, which I was not expecting

zebrapig · 27/08/2018 21:48

I asked for it with my ELCS this time round (2nd child, 4th pregnancy) and they agreed to do it. I'm 34. Unfortunately DS arrived 7 weeks early by EMCS and they wouldn't do it. I've been nagging DH to get the snip ever since (8 months) and if he hasn't by Christmas I'll go to the go and ask again, as at the end of the day it's me that can't have more kids.

Original poster
BlairWaldorfsHeadband · 28/08/2018 08:02

Thanks for the thoughts everyone.

bang sorry to hear of your miscarriages. It’s shit. Flowers it’s definitely something I will consider carefully but because the risks of another pregnancy are so high, I am fairly sure I do not want to do it again. One of the reasons I had my kids young was because I wanted to get it out the way. I’m also not sure it’s wise to have many more cesareans!

It’s not something I will rush into though.

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