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Feeling really down about all of this :(

11 replies

shotgun1 · 13/08/2018 05:47

I'm visiting family at the moment as we live hundreds of miles away. My parents have been treating me really badly and I've had to limit contact with them so my brother kindly let me stay with them while we're visiting. His wife is probably the kindest, most considerate person I know and actually purchased new beds for their house to accommodate us. She assures me they were planning to get these anyway but just did it a little sooner for us visiting.

Unfortunately, my brother who is epileptic and recently got his driving licence back, had 3 seizures yesterday, the first one was whilst we were out for his daughters birthday lunch. He never fully came round at the end of that one and proceeded to have 2 more and even by the end of the day, he was still very confused. SIL spent the day in hospital and i took care of our 4 girls while she was away (with a little help from some other family members). My other SIL (we'll call her SIL2) was here and brushed the girls teeth at bedtime whilst I tidied up the bedrooms. We put the girls to bed and then I realised wed forgotten to take them to the toilet after brushing their teeth. SIL2 assured me they had gone to the toilet before their bath which was directly before we put them to bed and that it would be fine. I went along with it but we've just been woken up by my DD (aged 4) as she's wet the bed. SIL didn't have a waterproof sheet down so it went onto her lovely new memory foam mattress. I explained to her that it was my fault and I should have lifted the girls when I realised they hadn't been to the toilet. She assures me it's fine but I'm feeling so guilty about it. I've had so much going on lately with my strained relationship with my parents and with everything that's happened to my lovely brother, it's probably not helping. But I'm lying here awake feeling absolutely ruBBISH. Not sure what I'm hoping to gain by this post but I feel somewhat better for even just writing it down.

OP posts:
Downeyhouse · 13/08/2018 05:59

I feel for you.

And hope your brother is poor better.

Are you in financial position to replace the mattress? If not pease don’t worry. Your SIL sounds lovely and as if she has her priorities rights. Maybe when she is facing so many fears with your brother then the mattress truly does not matter to her.

2018SoFarSoGreat · 13/08/2018 05:59

You poor thing. It will be fine. Your lovely Sil will totally understand.

Downeyhouse · 13/08/2018 05:59

Soon better! Not poor better :)

JustlikeDevon · 13/08/2018 06:04

I really wouldn't worry, these things happen. I do hope your brother feels better soon.
I will add, as gently as possible...You are all worried about your brother/husband. Don't let sil have to comfort you over a mattress when she is worrying about her husband.

NotAgainYoda · 13/08/2018 06:07

You poor thing. Your SIL sounds lovely and I am sure you'd be as understanding of the situation were reversed. Accidents happen! Forgive yourself for a mistake.

I am so sorry to hear about your DB. Wishing you well.

NotAgainYoda · 13/08/2018 06:08

I also think writing things down helps Smile

NarcolepticOuchMouse · 13/08/2018 06:13

If you have the time, go to Wilkos and head for the pet section. They do urine destroyer, It's about £4 a bottle and it has enzymes in it that break down the urine (you can actually watch it disappear). Spray it on, let it do its thing, dab it up and leave it to try. Afterwards you won't be ably to tell it ever happened. I had two puppies, the same age and the same time, that stuff is magic!

Sleephead1 · 13/08/2018 06:14

please don't worry about it it's a accident I've had it happen in my bed and it didn't bother me in the slightest it's a child these things happen. I'm sure at the moment the mattress will be the last thing on her mind. Be kind to yourself and each other and I hope your brother is better soon

Toddlerteaplease · 13/08/2018 09:48

Was just going to suggest the pet spray. It's brilliant.

shotgun1 · 13/08/2018 22:28

Thank you all for the support last night. I've been on a bit of an emotional rollercoaster this past 6 weeks and I think last night/this morning, I just crumbled a little. Luckily my brother is much better and out of hospital. The mattress cleaned up nicely too ☺️

OP posts:
2018SoFarSoGreat · 14/08/2018 00:00

Excellent update. Flowers

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