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Mother AND Husband Ill- How to manage both?

1 reply

HamsterToast · 10/07/2018 14:15

My sister and mother live up north. I am about 3 hours travel away. My mother had a breakdown a few months ago and has recently got out of hospital for it. She is improving but struggling too. I had offered to move into our family home (where she currently lives alone) with my husband and pets to help her as she is anxious and lonely, but she said she 'couldn't cope' with it. She continues to need support she isn't getting regarding her mental health and I am concerned for the future.

In the last few weeks we have found out my husband most likely has a serious condition which may stop him working and at worst might kill him. We have no family or support network where we live.

Even more now, I want to move in with my mother. It would help her and help me and help my husband to be together. My sister/Bro in law/nephew live 10 mins from my mother so all the family would be together.

It seems crazy that we are here when my family needs my support and I need theirs. But we could only move up there now if it was into my family home due to not having the money to relocate (rent, deposit, fees etc). It will take at least a year to save that.

What should I do? Nothing and hope for the best here? Try to persuade my mother again even though she has made it clear she 'couldn't cope'?

*FYI she is anxious about everything and couldn't cope with maybe bumping into my husband on the way out of the loo, and she also believes she couldnt cope with my cats because she doesn't like cats. Otherwise we are a functional and loving lot.

OP posts:
Elementtree · 10/07/2018 14:21

You have asked and she has said no. She has made this decision for you. It doesn't really matter how much you think it could be a good idea.

I think your only option is to deal with things as they are and look to see how or what you can do without moving to your mum's house.

I hope things improve, op Flowers

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