SIL’s nasty habits

[whydoesshedoit]

I have got to the stage where I dread going out with my ILs. They always go everywhere en masse and that means oldest SIL tags along with her boyfriend.

Thing is, SIL has some personal habits which she does in public and it’s embarrassing. For example she’s a sniffer. She sniffs everything! The menu in a restaurant, each forkful of food before eating, her fingers, her children’s fingers. It is very odd. There’s no learning issues here, according to DH anyway. It’s a family joke with the ILs, MIL finds in hilarious. And it’s not just a surreptitious sniff, it’s an exaggerated sniff sniff sniff turning the item round to have a good sniff of each side.

The worst thing she does though is pick. Picks at her children’s hair, skin, ears. and last time we went out, sat squeezing a spot on her boyfriends arm just while we we sat at the table 🤮.

And sniffing whatever she got out. 😩

I don’t want to go out in public with her anymore. It’s horrible.

I would trade mine for yours in a heartbeat.

SleepDeprived4 😳 What on earth does she do?

Woah! That’s really gross/irritating/antisocial!

I’m not sure I wouldn’t just say something to her!

Hideandgo What do I say though? MIL saw me looking and made a joke of it and must know that it’s not normal because she mentioned it on the phone again a few days later.

I’ve just realised, she’s grooming like a monkey, that is what it is. Why would she fo that in public though?

God that's disgusting.
I would probably avoid going out with them. If I couldn't avoid it and we were somewhere like a restaurant, I would ask her to stop every time she sniffs/picks something and tell her it's putting me off my food. If she didn't stop I'd leave. It's really is gross. I don't understand how her family are ok with this. And she has a boyfriend? How does he feel about having his spots squeezed and sniffed in public? How old is she?

She’s in her 40s!

When MIL mentioned it to me on the phone, I should have said something but she blurted it out (“SIL makes us laugh, she sniffs everything, she’s always done that!” sort of thing). I might have to get DH to say something, it’s his sister after all and it would be better coming from him.

Sounds like SIL has a long standing MH condition. Shame her parents didn't get her some help years ago. Personally I'd avoid going out with them whenever possible.

Do you think? I thought it was bad habits that no one has ever pulled her up about. FIL is a bit like that, doesn’t know how to behave in public.

It does sound oddly compulsive. It's not good that her family are down playing it. Perhaps she needs some kind of therapy. Can't understand how she has a boyfriend. I could not spend time with someone who was constantly sniffing everything. And trying to pick at me and sniff it makes me feel ill just thinking about it.

Qcumber She’s been married twice before. They leave her, perhaps that’s one of the reasons why.

MIL is the type who would never admit any one of her children was at fault and this SIL is the golden first born, so MIL would always downplay it.

@whydoesshedoit I would need a whole new thread for this one lol. Rest assured your sil sounds like a saint compared to mine.