Anyway out of this dilemma?

[chipauchoc]

Please can someone offer any advice on this situation. We will call the person Bob.

Bob earns a decent wage
Bob has debt from a previous relationship, ex was credit blacklisted so all debt in Bobs name.
CSA was calculated using Bobs decent wage before debt repayments. CSA will not consider a variation. Ex will not accept less money or help with paying back debt.
After CSA and debt repayments Bob can only afford a single room in a shared house.
Bob would like to have his DC more, however because of all his outgoings he struggles to pay rent in a shared house let alone be able to afford to rent a larger property to accommodate his DC's. No overnight stays, therefore no reduction in CSA and everyone suffers because of the quality of contact time with DCs.

Is there anyway out of this cycle? All options considered.

Wwyd? Asking for a friend. TIA

I haven't got any advice but am bumping for you.

This is the problem with taking on debt for other people, obviously.

How long will he be paying these debts off?

Can he have overnight contact at his parents' house or the house of another family member?

I think I'd advise him to go and see a free debt adviser ie at CAB and see if there's another option to manage his debts.

Is it the same ex?
Would the ex entertain a ‘house swap’ for a couple of nights a week so Bob can stay with the children and ex can stay at the rented place (assuming it’s the same ex it would be kind to help out after the debts were shared)

Firstly, I want to say that Bob is doing exactly the right thing under the circumstances. The most important thing for him to pay is the maintenance for his children. Try not to think of this as a payment he is making to his ex - he's paying to keep a roof over his children's heads, clothes on their backs and food in their mouths. These costs aren't reduced because of his debts so he shouldn't be seeking to reduce the payments.

Otherwise, I would echo the advice of PPs above:

1. Seek some advice on a debt management programme which would balance getting the debts paid off as soon as possible, whilst still being able to feed and accommodate himself.

1. Explore options for having the children overnight at a friend or relative's, or try to maximise day and evening time with them, possibly also in someone else's house.

Why is she not paying this debt he was daft to put in name he will need to contact CSA and tell them hes struggling to pay his rent he can't afford a bigger place so u can have his daughter over nyt regularly and this is impacting on ure relationship and ask them how u can take them to court to argue your points in front of a judge u need to pay15 court fees CSA send u filed massive ones but tell him to seek the first 30 mins free lawyer and represent himself we did and won x

Could Bob get a second job in the short term to speed up getting the debt paid off?

Speak to Step Change about a debt management plan. It will affect his credit rating but that’s the least of his worries as I imagine he’s not planning on getting a new credit.

I took on all the debts from my ex. My choice as it protected my pension. I had a DMP and have recently cleared all of them. It’s not an overnight solution but it is one that worked for me.

Why won't CMS consider a variation based on Bob's debt?

Thank you everyone, Bob says CMS will not consider a variation but I have asked him to speak to NASCA to check this is the case. He pays £450 a month in travel costs to work as well, plus the debt repayments £700, plus CSA £800, plus rent £500, plus food, plus phone, plus car costs (an old banger but essential as his ex doesn't drive so he is responsible for all the picking up and dropping off of DCs at contact time). Seems incredibly unfair to me.
He can't seem to get himself on a debt management program as the money left at end of month, whist not enough to afford more than a single bed in a box room in a shared house, after food and outgoings leaves him with (a little) more than £50 to spend for the month. That is their threshold. This is what he tells me anyway.

Second job would kill him I think, all the stress is giving him physical and mental health problems. He already works 10 hours a day (with 2 hour commute on top) weekends he has contact with his Dcs so weekend not an option either.

He has no family - both parents died 20 years ago.

Step change sent managememt are good people to talk to.

Was he married to ex? Are they divorced? If they are then the debts should be taken into account. If not then I’m afraid it’s prob up to him to sort.

He’s doing the right thing by his dc but could he look at stays by at parents house over night and have th children too?