Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

BF trouble

5 replies

BFtrouble · 11/05/2018 13:17

Hi there! I read AIBU/WWYD all the time but first time poster… I have a terrible situation which is doing my head in and I want to know if I am being precious and creating my own trouble.....
We have lived for over 4 years now in a small town where everyone is nice to your face but that is about it … small community where everyone knows each other for longgggg time and not really open to ‘foreigners’. My DD is 8 and has had the same BF since she was 5, this girls mum has always being ‘nice’ to my face and we have had several playdates/sleepovers in both houses (mostly mine but that is not the problem…) etc… since last year or so it seems that this mum is purposely trying to separate the girls, not sure why, trying always to exclude my daughter from any outside schools activities, even though both girls are dying to hang out together, it is nothing she says but a feeling that I get all the time … day in, day out , I have to deal with my disappointed DD when the plans they have done are cancel or not supported by this mum…I have tried my DD to see other friends and she does and I have told her that maybe is better to be just BF during school but it doesn’t seem to stick to her or to the BF….

I am basically at the end of my tether and as much as I don’t want to bring it out with the mum as I think it should be the girls dealing with it … I am sick and tired of seeing my DD constantly sad ….? I have to say that when we have the playdates is only the kids… I am not hanging out with the mum and we are not friends not socially or anywhere so it is only the girls and the girl always seems to enjoy coming here and doesn’t seem to be the one with the problem…. So not sure what the issue could be …. WWYD if you were me?? Would you just keep talking to your DD and try just to encourage other kids to play with .. or would you ask directly the mum (I am not good in confrontation) what the hell is going on? Do nothing and keep having a miserable child?? Have you ever had anything like this?? Thanks a lot in advance!Blush

OP posts:
Aprilmightbemynewname · 11/05/2018 13:23

Imo extending your dd's list of friends is the way to go.
I wouldn't approach the dm for fear of making it worse - and her being openly offensive.
My dd 11 has a bf with a dm I don't have down as anything more than bf's dm and she doesn't think much of me either but we are polite for the girls friendship.
Weather is lovely, maybe suggest a Royal Wedding get together for some of her class in your garden?

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks · 11/05/2018 13:32

I find DD's BF's mum a cold fish. I really don't talk to her if I can help it. In our case it may be religious differences, which is sad. At least she doesn't try and dictate to her DD who she can be friends with though.

Aprilmightbemynewname · 11/05/2018 16:44

In our case its money that divides us!! They have only 2 dc while we have lots. And lots of cash to splash! While we def don't!
Funny her dd wants a younger sibling more than anything she says!

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

BFtrouble · 11/05/2018 20:05

Thanks for your replies. I guess I will suck it up and just continue trying to have other friends around and cope with the mum! Grin

OP posts:
twohandstwokids · 13/05/2018 08:58

My DS7 has had the same BFF since he was 3. They are great friends and I enjoy having him over. And vice versa.

I have noticed that my DS is now verging on obsessive with this friend. So I am encouraging him to also enjoy the company of others and find more friends. I think this will make him more resilient and a better communicator in the long term. It's not to the exclusion of the first. But I wonder if the same thing might be happening in your situation?

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.