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Giving up a hobby?

16 replies

OldJoseph · 16/04/2018 17:29

So dd has been going to a club for several years now and we've been lift sharing with a friend. The lift share has really helped us out and has been great.
Now the friend is going to stop going but I'm pretty sure dd won't want to stop.

Getting dd there and back is wearing, time consuming and costly, it's not however impossible for us to do until such time as our circumstances change.
I don't think there's another lift share available, although I've asked the leader if she knows of anyone. There's no public transport nearby.
I've suggested dd cuts down the amount of time she goes but her reply was that she may as well not go at all if she can't train at the higher level.
So WWYD? Continue as we are or make her stop / cut down? She really enjoys the activity and she's one of a few girls still doing it at her age. She's good but not brilliant and it's not about the social side of it because most of her friends have now left. I'm pleased that she wants to continue but sad and frustrated that just getting her there is a hassle. We have other DC who don't do much extra-curricular, but we would always support them if they wanted to do anything.
So have you made your DCs give something up against their will? Or were you made to give up something when you were young? How did you feel about this?

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junebirthdaygirl · 16/04/2018 17:34

Oh don't make her give it up. I presume from the details that she is a teen so anything they do and persevere at is to be encouraged. When she goes to college or moves to a new area it could be a way of meeting new people. It also sounds like exercise so thats important too and teen girls are inclined to bow out so keeping it going is good for her. I know its a pain getting her there and yes cutting down defeats the purpose.

TammySwansonTwo · 16/04/2018 17:34

How old is she? Obviously I would support her as much as possible but if it’s not physically possible to get here there then it’s not possible.

HollowTalk · 16/04/2018 17:36

How much time does it take and how far is it? Do you have to stay with her?

OldJoseph · 16/04/2018 17:37

I know you're right....it's such a pain though. Yes she's a teen and I'm proud of her commitment.

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OldJoseph · 16/04/2018 17:39

No I don't have to stay, phew! No it's not impossible it's just draining.

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OldJoseph · 16/04/2018 17:40

Once a week would keep her fit, twice a week would be needed for competitions.

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Sarkyharky · 16/04/2018 17:42

Twice a week!! Sorry but that's nothing!

OldJoseph · 16/04/2018 17:51

Sarky it feels like a lot to us. Glad you replied though, it's good to get some different views.

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HollowTalk · 16/04/2018 17:53

I think it's so great when children really want to do something, particularly if it's not something they're brilliant at, that I'd keep it going. Sorry!

OldJoseph · 16/04/2018 18:03

it's 2 x 40 mins there and back twice a week. She's there too long for us just to hang around nearby. The lift share was fab, they did one week (all journeys) and we did one week.

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frasier · 16/04/2018 18:05

So many parents are worried that their children play computer games or sit on SN sites any chance they get or even want to be out all the time fling goodness knows what... I know it’s hard work but keep it going for as long as you can. You’re lucky! Tired, but lucky!

AssignedLazyAtBirth · 16/04/2018 18:07

If it's not too remote, could you find something to do while she's at practice? Weekly shopping, maybe?

OldJoseph · 16/04/2018 18:16

Thanks you are giving me food for thought. I sometimes go shopping whilst she's there, I wouldn't want to do that regularly though.

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Sarkyharky · 16/04/2018 18:41

Sorry that sounded harsh. I drive one of mine 40 mins there and 40 mins back three times a week and she's there for an hour and a half. Plus another one an hour away twice a week!!

I take a book or download stuff from Netflix and read in the car Smile

OldJoseph · 16/04/2018 18:52

Sarky wow, that is a lot.

It's dh who is less keen on the whole thing more than me. Still we live where we live because of his job, if we'd have stayed where we were it would have been a lot easier.

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Sarkyharky · 16/04/2018 18:53

Yeah we also live somewhere specifically for DHs job and it's miles from anywhere so I feel your pain. Lovely to have a teen with a hobby though

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