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How to avoid being kissed....

11 replies

Localher0 · 02/04/2018 22:21

I need a strategy to avoid being kissed by someone I meet in a professional capacity. The first time we met I expected to shake hands but he kissed me on the cheek. I was a bit shocked but let it happen - it made me feel uncomfortable. At our second meeting he went for it again and again I didn't know how to stop it as I didn't want to appear rude (!!!). My husband was with me both times. I have now said to DH that I don't want to deal with this person anymore and he totally understands why. He trusts my intuition and hasn't questioned me at all.
I am hoping not to see this man again but i realise I am a 40 something who has allowed an over familiar person to make me feel very uncomfortable just because I (yes me!!) don't want to seem RUDE!! What do I do in future if this ever happens again - I guess I have to give myself permission to be rude because some twat doesn't understand boundaries!!!

OP posts:
CanIBuffalo · 02/04/2018 22:25

Try getting in with a clear move out of his way and say I have a cold sore coming.
Do this repeatedly and if you're questioned about it say you've had loads lately and you can never be too careful as they're v painful and you wouldn't want to spread the virus.
It's a lie.
You know it's a lie. He knows it's a lie. But if it works...

DontCallMeCharlotte · 02/04/2018 22:27

Hold out hand for handshake and literally push back and/or step back if he moves in for a kiss?

Also it depends what your profession is? If I were a "luvvie" then I'd expect kisses. Binman/woman not so much.

CanIBuffalo · 02/04/2018 22:28

Or
<a class="break-all" href="https://www.google.co.uk/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3D7uGnENk7GUI&ved=0ahUKEwjAos74w5zaAhXiBsAKHUJPCdQQo7QBCB8wAQ&usg=AOvVaw2vEb08IoA415RGFk3Kyg9n" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">www.google.co.uk/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3D7uGnENk7GUI&ved=0ahUKEwjAos74w5zaAhXiBsAKHUJPCdQQo7QBCB8wAQ&usg=AOvVaw2vEb08IoA415RGFk3Kyg9n

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Schmonday · 02/04/2018 22:29

Quick handshake and turn so he gets a mouthful of hair?

NataliaOsipova · 02/04/2018 22:31

Kissing - if the air kissing/two cheeks variety - is perfectly normal for some people. I think it's normal anyway; my DH hates it. Both fine - whatever you're comfortable with. If you actively want to avoid the kiss, initiate the (firm) handshake and then take a step back. He can't then kiss you without effectively lunging at you and looking a bit weird.....

Localher0 · 03/04/2018 08:29

Thanks all. I think I'm going to go for the Mr Bean approach!
On a serious note - no he's not a luvvie. He's a professional whose services we were planning to use. At the first meeting he had a colleague who didn't try any of the kissing nonsense - he was perfectly professional. Don't get me wrong - I am happy to kiss people I know well. I just think it's a totally inappropriate situation to go in for kissing new potential clients.
As I wrote it last night I was also stewing with rage at the thought that a bloke would not be in this situation.....

OP posts:
Mookatron · 03/04/2018 08:33

Just say 'I won't kiss you, I'm getting a cold.' ever time you see him.

daisychain01 · 03/04/2018 12:44

Why should the OP have to lie just to avoid having her personal space invaded?

She should be able to hold out her hand for a business like handshake, if he's that thick he doesn't get the hint, the OPs arm goes straight and the hand clenches into a fist that he'll have to walk into before getting near her face! He sounds like a slimeball.

OnTheRise · 03/04/2018 12:45

Hold your hand out for a handshake. If he goes in for a kiss, use your outstretched hand to shove him away and say "NO!" very firmly. Tell him you are not comfortable kissing. If he doesn't get the message, or takes offense, he is not someone you would want to work with.

PositivelyPERF · 03/04/2018 12:49

Get your husband to give him a big wet kiss, every time he meets him.

Or lick the side of his face, like a big dog. 👅

Or do a big wet sneeze on his face and tell him you must be allergic to his aftershave, body wash, etc.

Thinkingofausername1 · 07/04/2018 17:09

Someone did this to my dh once but not only kissed him on the cheek, she hugged him. A proper tight hug. I felt like slapping her because she did it right in front of me and ignored me and my daughter.
I would do what others suggested about moving away and offering your hand.

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