New born baby rights after partner has cheated

[Claireandlilah]

Hi all,
Hoping for a little guidance.
I was in what I believed to be a happy loving relationship we planned to have a baby and whilst pregnant I had a few health concerns so we stopped having sex I found out that my partner then cheated on me in this time... we agreed that we would draw a line under it he made a mistake however he started acting detached from me 6 weeks after birth... I know no he is having an affair with a married women at work who asked if he still wanted to continue now he is a dad to which he replied "yes he cheats on me all the time I don't need to know ;-)" I then read from other app messages and found this to be true.
I have left to stay at my mums after confronting him with the tx evidence he still said it just flirting and the rest wasn't this year. He wants to work it out but I do not our poor daughter is just 6 weeks old and my world has fallen apart.
Problem is now we live together in a house we picked together to bring our family up in but I'm not on the deeds I have however been paying half the mortgage but we have nothing in writing and I also pay for our food and all our babies expenses he pays nothing for her. He has made it clear that if we are not staying a couple I have no right to live there with our daughter but besides going back to my mum and dads I have no where to go long term? Can he kick us out with no notice all our stuff is there Or can I ask him to leave as well? I don't have the savings for a deposit as I stupidly spent a lot of money on our baby and getting the house ready with furnishings ect. Has anyone had any similar experience???

If he owns the house and you are not married then he can kick you out.

Go back to your parents. Take what you can and start again. You have no claim to the house, I'm sorry. Get maintenence sorted as soon as possible. What a bastard I'm so sorry.

Really? I wouldn’t be that hasty OP, I’d play the long game. I’d tell himthat you need some space and some time to think. I’d say that you don’t want to involve the whole family ... dirty laundry etc and I would ask him if he could go elsewhere so you can get your head straight. I would then speak to a solicitor and see what rights I have living in the family home after he has gone. I’m
Sure someone else will be along soon who knows more about this but I’m sure things change if you’re living there without him. What an absolute wanker. He will regret these days with his whole heart when your beautiful girl is a young woman who wants nothing to do with him. Bide your time OP, there’s no rush. Think very carefully about every decision you make right now.

The house is not a mutual asset. It is his alone. The law does not require him to provide housing for his ex and his baby. He needs to pay maintenance, but that's the end of it.

If they were married it'd be different, but they're obviously not.

Unfortunately the OP has no right to stay in the house she is not married to her partner and she is not on the deeds or mortgage . Her partner can throw her out.
The OP can apply fir child maintenance and nothing more. There are several topics on MN where the mother and child/children have been firced to leave the home they share with their unmarried partner because the house is not in joint names.

Thank you, he is now movig out for 2 months so I can think things over and he is going to go to counselling as we agree that he clearly has his own issues he needs to address. This however gives me time to speak to someone even if I have no Claim to the house at least I can find out if there is a notice period or if he can just click his fingers and we have to jump because i suspect when he gets over the denial that i do not want to be with him his tune will change. In the mean time it will give us time to save up for a deposit to rent somewhere else. (He definitely wouldn't be moving out for a bit i hadn't have read this as I wouldn't have had the balls to even suggest it and he wasn't going to volunteer)

Well done OP!! It’s so much better for your peace of mind to stay where you are, emotionally I can imagine you’re so frazzled right now, and living out of a suitcase with a baby would certainly only add to the stress.

I wouldn’t make things easy for him at all -you need as much time in that house as you can, in order to save as much money as possible to move on to somewhere appropriate, so your DD can have a proper home- not just something that’s available. It’s simply unacceptable with such a tiny baby to be moving house under these circumstances.

I would discuss the deposit with him, I’d discuss maintenance and I’d ask him outright what he’s prepared to do/provide without you having to involve a third party - thus costing you both more financially and mentally, you have very little head space with a new baby so I’d let him come up with a deal that you can then negotiate.

I just couldn’t be with someone who had done that to me when I was so vulnerable and when I needed him. You have more self-love than to reduce yourself by being with him OP.

I think you have tremendous strength and dignity OP, I can’t imagine how difficult this is with your little DD, he is so selfish and callous for putting you through this. You’re doing so so well