Hi, I’m just looking for some frank advice.. I’m not sure if I’m easily offended or if I have reason to be so angry and upset about my situation.. I generally don’t get offended but there is three people who offend me EVERY single time I’m near them and they continue to visit me so I can’t even withdraw from them.. One is my Gran who persistently ignores my requests to let me know before she arrives on my doorstep.. I have told her to stop bringing in sweets for the kids or to hide them but she manipulates a way so the kids find them and when I pull her up she laughs, she does things like this constantly, basically she will get her own way..
The other is my FIL, he has helped us so much but it was help I didn’t need nor want as I hate feeling I owe people.. He comes to our house every weekend and checks we have food and says things like ‘stay warm, don’t turn your heating off’ or ‘I don’t want the kids starving’ etc etc.. He has absolutely no reason to believe that we have ever went hungry or cold so it’s like he’s made things up in his head and now believes them, he is also very concerned with decor etc (more than most men) and tends to want things the way they are in HIS house but he’s considerably older than us.. my house is lovely so I have no idea why he’s like this but it hurts my feelings because I do nothing but make sure my house and kids are looked after beyond anything in the world, I feel it demeaning and he pays no attention when I try to tell him so..
the other is my SIL, she asks questions which I find demeaning also.. I have four kids (14,10,22 months and 4 weeks old) and she asks me if the baby has enough clothes etc.. What?? Of course she does!!! I just would never go to someone’s house and ask these things.. She also asked how I lay her in her cot etc.. please help me because I’m driving myself crazy thinking they are being disrespectful and I feel like I deserve the same respect I give others xx