I can't do this anymore!!! Basically a single mum!!!

[Torrelar]

Ladies I'm at my wits end!!! My bf never puts our son to sleep or even helps with his bedtime routine. He never changes or baths him unless I ask him to (he's never home to bath him always at the pub!!) He never does housework. He never cooks dinner. Never washes our sheets or even think about doing things like that. He is the laziest person I have ever met and I don't know what to do anymore as I love him dearly but he just is so lazy!! To the point where I want to move out. Since friday night he hasn't got in before 10pm and this happens every week. Saturday night he went out he didn't get in till Sunday morning 3am! Last night was 12am and tonight he has turned his phone off because I called him asking him when he'll be home and got angry because he said not till 10:30/11!!!! He wakes me and my son when he gets in that late. It's not fair on me why should i be alone in this parenting thing? This has been going on even all throughout my pregnancy. Should I leave him? Or any tips on getting him to stop being a lazy alcoholic????

What do I get? Nothing haha!!! I get to do the washing and the cleaning and the taking care of our son all day. I would understand if he had a hard job and worked crazy hours but he only works if there is a job on (still gets paid minimum) and he hasn't been busy in MONTHS. So he's done sfa!!

What I DID, was leave

You will reduce your workload, your stress and find some peace

Has he always been like this?

Tell him to shape up or piss off, sounds like being a single mum would actually be easier no?

Don't give the matter any more thought. Just leave. The guy's a waste of space.

He's unlikely to ever be different, and it's easier to leave now and start to rebuild a better life than to look back in 20 years and see you've wasted a life. Just leave. You'll love someone else, honestly.

He doesn't sound great to be honest! Has he always been like this?

Yes always been like this. He has a heart of gold sometimes and would do anything for me if I asked. But I shouldn't have to ask? It should be that he wants to look after his son etc... I'm not sure how to leave. I have no money. I have no family here (I'm Australian) and don't know how I could afford to live somewhere and pay for childcare. Also I EBF my concern there is I'd have to put him on formula. Not shaming formula but just not what I want for my child. Ughh I am so trapped

CoveredInFondant I guess I'm just scared. I just want what's best for my son and if I leave I may end up homeless without my son. I'm going to the council tomorrow. See what they can do. I have to put myself and my son first I am just so terrified.

CoveredInFondant I guess I'm just scared. I just want what's best for my son and if I leave I may end up homeless without my son. I'm going to the council tomorrow. See what they can do. I have to put myself and my son first I am just so terrified.

What's your situation? Unmarried, SAHP, renting?

He will still have to pay child maintenance.

If he will do anything for you, just ask him to stop being a lazy alcoholic, but of course he won't do anything difficult for you will he?

RunRabbitRunRabbit yes to all 3. Unmarried, SAHP and privately renting.
You are right. I guess I am partially blind when it comes to love and I sugar coat things. I deserve more than this! I just don't know how/where to start.

RunRabbitRunRabbit yes to all 3. Unmarried, SAHP and privately renting.
You are right. I guess I am partially blind when it comes to love and I sugar coat things. I deserve more than this! I just don't know how/where to start.

You start by telling him either you or he is moving out. (Are you both equal tenants?) He'll act like you're mad, and its come as a complete shock blah blah blah.

You can then either talk, see if he'll 'Change' (he won't)

Or, sign on for everything you're entitled to and go it alone, its possible, thousands do it.

But do something because life's too short to waste being unhappy.

So leave him? What's the alternative?

How are you doing op?