How young is too young?

[FrostyPopThePenguinLord]

I have several hen parties and 2 weddings next summer (June and July) and I'm due to give birth in early March.

They are all very good friends and we have discussed options with them. Neither wedding is child free, I am however very aware that no one wants a screaming baby in the middle of their vows and I'd like to avoid that if possible. I'm a bridesmaid at both so I can't really just nip out with them.
The first wedding we have arranged my husband will wait at the evening venue with the baby whilst I go to the wedding itself as he isn't part of the ceremony.
The second wedding at the end of July involves both of us in the wedding party and I'm worried about being away from the baby all day and possibly a night as I don't see how we can bring them and deal with them if needed as part of the wedding. We would leave it (don't know gender yet) with my mum if she is free, but if she is away I don't know what we will do.
What age did you feel ok to leave your babies with a close family member, or is it something I'll just have to grit my teeth and do.

Baby will be approx 4 months old by then? I'd say baby will be fine to stay with close relatives by then. Both mine stayed with a relative by about 3 months. The only issue will be if you breastfeed

That is a concern, I have no doubt my mother is totally capable, I'm more concerned about me being a basket case and ruining my friends wedding by fretting/leaking everywhere 😂

You don't HAVE to do anything. I'd say your duties as a mother outweigh any obligation as a bridesmaid, baby comes first so don't be made to feel guilty about it by childless brides. If they have children of their own they will understand perfectly.

However, if you know that the new baby settles well with DM (or A.N.Other) then you won't feel uncomfortable about leaving them for the day, as long as the baby has enough food. At 3-4 months DD was very happy with both my DM and sister, so it worked out well for me. At that age their priority is being fed, changed and cuddled to sleep with a bit of crawling, raspberry-blowing and attempts at rolling over in between.

Good luck with the baby! It's still early days in your pregnancy, I wish you well.

I have only recently left DD overnigjt at 15 months and that was with DH. She was a formula feed baby. If you have a breast feed baby you may simply not be able to leave them for more than an hour or so at four months.

All of my friends are being very understanding, I'm just very aware that small babies are a lot of work and I won't be able to do it as easily as a bridesmaid and I don't want to ruin their ceremony with my little banshee. The evening causes me less stress because I can get up and leave the room if I have to, it's just a bit tricky from the front of a church.
I hope if I bring a ton of breast pads and pump in advance then I should be good to go for a few hours at least if I am breastfeeding.

It may work perfectly but not everyone can express and not all babies will take bottles. You won't know these things until your baby is here.

My daughter was 9 weeks old (breastfed) when I was a bridesmaid for my sister..
DH held her and had an expressed bottle just incase, while I walked down the aisle.

She started crying loudly during the speeches so I scuttled out the room with her to feed. If I didn't have a bridesmaid dress on, I would've just fed at the table. (I wasn't at the high table).
I had a baby carrier and my buggy with me. But we also had an 18 month old so needed it haha!

My cousin got married last year and my daughter was nearly 3. She ended up in their pictures at the high table because she's obsessed with my cousin and just wanted to be on her lap.

I find people accommodate little kids quite well if they're not grumpy. Especially if your baby is 4 months, I feel people would help hold them.

^^If the people are not grumpy, or the kids?

I was at an all day wedding when my dd was 3 months. I was BF and my parents booked into the same B and B as we did to look after her but they weren't at wedding. It meant we could enjoy our day and then at end of night she was still in with us and my parents enjoyed having her. I just made sure I had expressed loads and had to take my pump with me to express in the toilets to relieve my overflowing boobs!