Inappropriate social worker?

[pixydust94]

Firstly, hi to all those other mummies out there! I'm brand new to this, and expecting my first bundle of joy in 5 weeks time!
Ill try to keep this short and sweet, so will get to the point so hopefully you can help me!

My baby has a social worker, and it's at a child protection stage (due to many lies from previous social worker!- which is another issue I'm advocating against).

However, this new social worker (who is an older male) keeps contacting me during out of his working hours times, and now on weekends too!
I already know that this behaviour is highly inappropriate, but I'm not sure what to do!

Should I report it to his team manager (or any other relevant professional) or just keep ignoring him when he contacts me out of his working hours and only respond on weekdays between 9-5?

What would you do please?!

I was told by my own worker that he had to refer it to a pre birth assessment when I told him I was pregnant, and he had told me it was policy and procedure for the reasons I said above (because I'm still an active case with the Leaving Care team). So I can only go by what I'm being told by the professionals. But my worker has been my worker for around 5 years, and we have a good professional relationship! I trust him completely. But again, he's MY worker, and never once has he contacted me out of hours, certainly never on a weekend!

This new social worker comes on board, (he's also new to the team too), and I'm being contacted quite regularly during what I've always been told is 'out of hours' and 'inappropriate times'.
The worker has already missed his first 2 deadlines of what he needs to be doing on this CP stuff too. Not only that but they've made multiple mistakes in the offices reports/documents etc, some of the extremely serious and absolute lies!

It's so difficult to ask for help from people who don't know the entire situation to judge it fairly. But thankyou all for your help so far!

You do NOT have to be assessed just because you were in the care system.

Op, could it simply be he is very busy and as such, struggles to manage his workload in the time frame given and works extended hours?

What exactly is your issue with him contracting you out of office hours, if the content of the contact is completely appropriate?

Irrelevant of perceived etiquette, if the contact it's self is appropriate, and it's not at weird times like midnight or something, just slightly later evening or a weekend morning, what's the issue? I think I'd just assume he was doing his job.

Could you have a polite word, just ask him how come he contacts you out of hours? He probably will say it's his case load.

PreparingToBeAMummy- I'm only able to do what you guys are doing to help me here.

I can only go by what I'm being told and the information I'm being given. It does seem EXTREMELY unfair that just because a child has been in the care system, if they become pregnant whilst still an active case, they must be assessed/have a pre birth assessment!

But again, can only go by the information I'm being fed by others unfortunately!

Overall, there is no huge concern. My worker has already said that. The 1st worker of my baby had said that too, and then lied black and blue in her report, sweet and innocent as pie to me, encouraging, supportive! What seemed to be an outstanding worker, brilliant right up to when she had to write her report, and it was like it had been written by an enemy with what she put in it. (But that's another case where it has been taken to the director to be investigated now, so separate issue).

I'm sorry I don't 'tag' people when I'm responding, I'm still figuring out how to use this! Just signed up today🙈

If you have been volunterring for several years i am going to assume you are at least 20+. Is that correct?

Why is it you still have a social worker? As in why are you still an active case.

I get the feeling there are some details that could be important missing here.

The 'higher ups' in my local authority wouldn't have a clue what was normal practice amongst frontline social workers.

Yes, I'm 23. Still an active case because I'm in (or was in and it's now on hold due to pregnancy) an apprenticeship, so some form or education so my case is to remain open until I finish my apprenticeship

The 'higher ups' of the Children's Services I've been volunteering for (not as a worker or anything like that!) but as a young person advocating on behalf of the rest of the county's LAC and CL, some of them really have their heads screwed on! My 'manager' I suppose she would be called, is fantastic. Any questions I need answers to regarding the system/policies, she has them!

We don't need to know all the details. This is an anonymous forum. OP should only post what she is comfortable with revealing.

As pp have said, first of all I would ask him directly and politely why he is contacting you at these times. Explain that another SW told you out of hours contact is inappropriate.

What you do next depends on what his response is. If he has an unconventional working pattern or is overloaded and catching up, that's fair enough. If it's something else or nothing in particular, you could consider contacting his manager if you are still not happy.

And good luck for the rest of your pregnancy and the birth.

Why is your baby under child protection?

Is the social worker contacting you out of hours YOUR social worker or your baby's social worker?

The rules regarding contacting young people out of ours and contacting parents/ carers out of hours may be different. I am a teacher and would never try and contact a student outside of working hours but I have called and emailed parents in the evenings or at weekends before.

Has the social worker tried to contact you within working hours prior to contacting you outside of them? If you're very hard to get hold of during the working day then he might feel it would be more convenient and practical for you for him to call later in the evening or to email at the weekend. I think, however, that if it makes you uncomfortable the best thing is just to politely ask them not to contact you after 6pm or at weekends. If they continue to do so even after you've asked them not to then maybe it is something I would report.

It's not inappropriate. SW often work from home both evenings and weekends to catch up on their reports etc

Can you give an example of the times he is calling you?

The social worker is my baby's social worker, not mine. They've just recently changed it over to this new chap from my baby's previous social worker. I'm just finding it extremely odd because I've had many workers with my background history, and not once have I ever been contacted on a weekend, or outside of their working hours.

Should I respond to his message today then, or wait until Monday (I only say this because I'm saying all this stuff about if it's inappropriate him contacting me at these times, so don't want to do the same thing myself, if that makes sense?🙈).

Monday, I will be calling his manager anyway and finding out what his exact working hours are. But I'm pretty sure that they're the same as my own workers.

Should I respond to his messages/contact on Monday, politely let him know I've been informed by other professionals that being contacted at the times he is contacting me isn't appropriate, then go from there and see if he continues/stops or has a VERY reasonable explanation for his contact?

Also just got off the phone to my partner, who's also on the CP and involved just as much as I am, and the worker hasn't once contacted him at the times he has done with me, or turned up unannounced at his home address either (I get that they are permitted to do 'spot visits' etc and call round unannounced!)

Yes, he's contacted me multiple times within 'working hours' perfectly fine. I'm easy to get hold of! He only done a home visit with me yesterday too.

Next weeks thread: 'I work full time and my child's social worker is refusing to contact me out of working hours so I'm struggling to have the necessary conversations I need to have with them. AIBU that the social worker should try and be a bit more flexible?'

Can you speak to your own SW? That would be my response - you have a good relationship with him so he could guide you as to what's appropriate or not.

What exactly is your baby's SW asking? I think I'd message back asking if it can wait till Monday.

Hatgirl what works for one person doesn't work for all. So OP should just be uncomfortable because hey some people may prefer that??

Moreisnnogedag- I think I will do that, speak to my own worker first, see what he says and then proceed from there. I'm in 2 minds on contacting the other worker today or leaving it till Monday! Will it make me 'just as bad' (not bad but can't think of another way to explain it!) messaging him back today after I've moaned he's contacted me on the weekend?
Thankyou to those of you who are helping and giving their advice also!

I wouldn't respond to him over the weekend if it can wait until Monday, then I would ask my SW or manager what the current policy is on contact out of office hours, as I believed it wasn't recommended but am receiving lots of messages from new SW. See what they say

OlennasWimple It can wait till Monday, it's nothing of major importance or urgency, otherwise I'd have responded straight away if it was of huge urgency/importance. Which is why I don't understand why he's not waited till Monday to contact me about it anyway.

I think I may also speak with the Independant chair, as the SW has missed both of his first 2 deadlines, and seems very unorganised too. Which is possibly WHY he's contacting me at what I class as 'out of hours'. But will get that confirmed or not on Monday too!

I think you're taking the right approach. I would definitely raise the fact that he's missed deadlines as well, although as a pp said, that might explain why he's contacting you at weekends because he's trying to catch up.

The suggestion of speaking to your own social worker is also a good one.

Op you seem to know your way around the social worker relationship.
If you feel he is overstepping the Mark tell him.
keep a record of contact and go higher up if he is not respecting the boundaries.
You have said he is new so perhaps he is being a bit over zealous?
If it's just a case of him bothering you outside working hours and nothing inappropriate or seedy then a word might be all it takes.

Many years and experience of being in the system! You learn it all along the way lol. Which is why I'm so unsettled and on edge about this new worker and his actions. Especially after how the last one turned out to be!
Will have to see what they have to say on Monday, and go from there, not much else can be done over the weekend when the offices are closed!