Have been friends for 18 years - met thro babies .
She comes from quite a priveledged background and whilst this in itself is not a problem she can st times be insensitive to the fact it's not like that for others and maybe sometimes not say about her life of material ease . For eg Every half term goes off to one of her ( two ) family owned homes - mentions to folk who just can't ever do anything st half term , 5 weeks holiday abroad in summer travelling etc .
Children bought Mac books , clothes etc by g parents - I know it's a different world but I thknk they there should be an awareness of others reality ?
Other friends have said they don't really like her and just couldn't be here pal due to this . Can appear smug .
However , over the years we have had lots of fun as well as she has implied that she is more ' real ' with me than the majority of her friends . The friends were experienced as cliquey by other s I'm told in the school yard as they are similar professions or mostly it's that the husbands are - the dw not needing to work or work much . It did strike me that apart from myself the friends are identikit .
Anyway I've made excuses for what I see as inappropriate comments st times such as " I don't understand why people get depressed " because we had the children together , had history and some good times . And I have my own faults too of course !
However , we have noticed that whilst we have done things like take their dd on holiday ( which for us was exoebive as cottages are ) and the girls say they are best friends so you wd think they wanted time together .. my dd has not for some years been invited to similar in the holiday homes whilst others have abs to my mind I'm asking why ? I'm maybe feeling sensitive .
My dd was due to go travelling with their dd and their dd has now decided to go with dd from my friends group leaving my dd with no one to go with . The group said they don't kno her so wd not want her to go .
I texted my friend ( maybe shdnt have ) to let her know that my dd was upset about this - she did reply in a limited text , but when I asked if it cd be sorted out as her dd had promised to go with my dd ( both 18 )she didn't reply .
I know it's up to the dd s to sort out really ..! And they have . However I somehow get the feeling I'm fed up of feeling a bit inferior .. maybe that says more about me than her tho ? But I spoke to a close friend about it and she said if it was her she wd talk to her dd and say it s not on to dump a friend and she could not tolerate that sort of friendship .
I felt confused so I left it after she didn't reply to my text trying to help the dd s situation - then a few weeks later I got a text from her - not reffering to my last text - but saying miss you ..I've been busy but are you free ..
The friendship has been good and she does tell me stuff she doesn't share with others as it's mostly the smiley face she shows to her group . And she has supported me too .
But the dynamic of her being insensitive has long been there - her dh has told her she is not v emotionally intelligent at times . And this thing with the dd has really upset me . Final straw ? Talk to her ? ( but how will she understand ? I can hardly tell her several people find her cliquey can I ??? ) I'm not one just to dump folk and the gap is starting to feel evident now and if she asks me I just don't know what to say or what to do !
I know I have to weight up the pros and cons of the friendship logically but I'm v loyal person - despite a feeling that the differences may be too big .... feel terrible even thinking tvst really ..