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Punchline to Les Dawson joke...can anyone help please?

27 replies

SpiritualKnot · 10/02/2007 20:26

Heard a funny joke years ago from Les Dawson and forgot the punchline. Heard it again about 2 years ago ...and my husband turned the TV over just before the punchline...I went crazy, but by the time he'd turned it back the joke was over, the audience was laughing. Every now and again I think...I'm going to go to my grave wondering what that punchline was.

I've looked on google and asked Jeeves and colleagues and friends and no-one has heard of it. So I thought I'd try here.

Please appreciate this is a Les Dawson joke and is done with some face pulling expressions...not meant to offend.

A man and his 2 daughters and wife who have some facial deformities are going to bed one night.

The dad says to one daughter: "Daughter dear can you blow out the candle?" Daughter dear tries but when she blows, the air escapes out the left side of her mouth and so the candle stays lit.

The dad says: "Other daughter can you do it please?" Other daughter tries but the air escapes out of the right side of her nouth and again the candle stays lit.

Dad asks his wife, but when she blows, she blows upwards..candle stays lit.

I'll do it myself he says, but when he blows, he blows down...candle stays lit.

Just then the dad sees the local vicar passing by and shouts him over and asks him to blow the candfle out. The vicar, licks his finger and thumb and extinguishes the flame between them.

The dad says............the punchline....

That's the bit I don't know. Can anyone help?????? This is a serious request, it's so frustrating not knowing!

Appreciate it if anyone knows.

OP posts:
drosophila · 10/02/2007 20:43

I'll ask dp he had a great memory but won't be able to answer you till tomorrow if he knows.

DeputyMacDawg · 10/02/2007 20:45

I know the joke you mean, but can't remember the punchline.
I'll keep trying, though

Bladee · 10/02/2007 20:48

ermmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Whizzz · 10/02/2007 20:49

If its any help (it isn't !!) DH says he remembers his dad doing this joke (no his dad wasn't Les D) bt can't remember the punchline either

Flumpytina · 10/02/2007 20:49

sorry can't help (but can appreciate how mega frustrating such things are).

Have you tried posting a message here , a super Les Dawson fan will probably know.

mollymawk · 10/02/2007 20:49

Sorry I can't help with this, but the reason is that my grandad used to tell me this joke when I was a child (this was one of only two jokes in his repertoire of comedy) but in his version the vicar putting out the candle with his fingers was the punchline...

Whizzz · 10/02/2007 20:51

thats what DH said too !!

Bladee · 10/02/2007 20:51

Les Dennis??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????// nah.....................................................................

Whizzz · 10/02/2007 20:53

Nooooo Bladee - Les Dawson

Bladee · 10/02/2007 20:57

Les DAWSON???????????????????? My gawd..... even worse...............................

DeputyMacDawg · 10/02/2007 21:37

Am having vague memories of Les saying something in a 'Sylvester the Cat' type voice. 'thankth'; sort of thing....???

mollymawk · 10/02/2007 22:47

Does nobody know? I was getting my hopes up that there was, after all, a funny version of my grandad's joke...

SpiritualKnot · 11/02/2007 10:16

I'm sure there is something after the candle is put out by the vicar. Punchline was something with the dad saying about the vicar "All that education and ......" Didn't put that when I first posted as I'm not sure of it and thought it might not be correct..... I've put it on the Les Dawson site as suggested by Flumpytina (Thankyou for that ), so I'll let you know if they alert me with any responses. If anyone knows or can suggest anything in the meantime then let us know!!

OP posts:
SaintGeorge · 11/02/2007 15:23

I don't think there is a verbal punchline. The joke is the long drawn out story then the vicar just snuffing the candle easily.

SaintGeorge · 11/02/2007 15:23

Oops, just seen someone said that earlier.

brx8r · 20/05/2017 12:53
RaptorInaPorkPieHat · 20/05/2017 12:58

Here you go:

RaptorInaPorkPieHat · 20/05/2017 12:59

Oh crap it's a ZOMBIE THREAD

7354girl · 06/08/2021 14:32

The joke is on youtube. Just type in les Dawson and joke can't blow the candle out.
It's actually not funny in the least!

TheQueef · 06/08/2021 14:35

Funny enough to resurrect a four year old thread though eh 7345?

7354girl · 06/08/2021 15:39

Can't stand loose ends!

myotherusernameistaken · 06/08/2021 16:26

@TheQueef

Funny enough to resurrect a four year old thread though eh 7345?
Zombie point of order - it's fourteen years old.
CormoranStrike · 06/08/2021 16:36

@SpiritualKnot

Heard a funny joke years ago from Les Dawson and forgot the punchline. Heard it again about 2 years ago ...and my husband turned the TV over just before the punchline...I went crazy, but by the time he'd turned it back the joke was over, the audience was laughing. Every now and again I think...I'm going to go to my grave wondering what that punchline was.

I've looked on google and asked Jeeves and colleagues and friends and no-one has heard of it. So I thought I'd try here.

Please appreciate this is a Les Dawson joke and is done with some face pulling expressions...not meant to offend.

A man and his 2 daughters and wife who have some facial deformities are going to bed one night.

The dad says to one daughter: "Daughter dear can you blow out the candle?" Daughter dear tries but when she blows, the air escapes out the left side of her mouth and so the candle stays lit.

The dad says: "Other daughter can you do it please?" Other daughter tries but the air escapes out of the right side of her nouth and again the candle stays lit.

Dad asks his wife, but when she blows, she blows upwards..candle stays lit.

I'll do it myself he says, but when he blows, he blows down...candle stays lit.

Just then the dad sees the local vicar passing by and shouts him over and asks him to blow the candfle out. The vicar, licks his finger and thumb and extinguishes the flame between them.

The dad says............the punchline....

That's the bit I don't know. Can anyone help?????? This is a serious request, it's so frustrating not knowing!

Appreciate it if anyone knows.

I’ve heard this “joke” many years ago. From memory the funny but is the vicar putting the candle out with wet fingers, and it’s just (allegedly) so funny that people with cleft lips and palates cannot make a deal and blow properly.

You can tell I’m not a fan.

CormoranStrike · 06/08/2021 16:37

*seal

LadyCatStark · 06/08/2021 16:38

Surely when the OP said she’d asked Jeeves, it became clear that this was a very old thread 😂.

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