School coach broke my sons arm

[Annie5378]

Hi I'm looking for advice, yesterday I got a phone call from the primary school I have a son in year 5 age9 he was playing football
With the school coaches at lunch , the school coach is a semi professional
Footballer, now my son was in net and the coach there the ball so hard at him that he has broken his arm trying to catch it in goal, he's got a cast on it after waiting four hours in hospital yesterday, what do
You think I should do now with regards the school and their employed coach? Many thanks

That happened with my dh and ds. They were forever playing football a nd once dh kicked hard ds tried to stop the ball and it broke his wrist. Ds was kind of proud of his plaster.

Just tell the principal that ds arm was broken when you went to A and E. Tell him that his teacher needs to know he won't be able to write. That's it.

Thread title is very misleading. It was an accident, the sort that happens every single day when people play football.

So the school coach didn't break your sons arm then. It got broken during a training session. Complete accident. I'd be concentrating on getting your son better and making sure he doesn't miss too much school. Poor coach must feel awful.

The OP was upset - not that surprising. She didn't mention money. She asked what she should do.
I also don't understand all of the comments implying there isn't any difference between a child kicking a football at full strength and an adult kicking a ball at full strength. Of course, there's a difference.
That doesn't mean it was the force behind it that caused the injury and it doesn't mean it was deliberate.
OP call the school for a chat or pop in. Let them know how your DS is.
I'm sure the school will check to see if there are any steps they can take to mitigate the risk of it happening again. Unlike us, they will have access to everyone involved. They'll also be aware that they can't make schools accident-free zones.

Is he a youngish coach? Not that it should matter but 20 something lads rarely know their own strength.

Maybe coaches need more first aid training? My son broke his arm during football club at lunchtime at school and they made him carry on for the rest of the day then told me when I collected him that he'd hurt his arm, he was pale and tearful. The arm was clearly very swollen and bent in the wrong direction, it was broken and required 8 weeks of plaster!

So you didn't think the coach broke your son's arm? You knew it was just an accident and you weren't looking to point the finger at anyone? You knew that you'd deal with it calmly, and wouldn't be at all cross with the coach or school?

So what were you looking for here?

Hang on, is asking him to do your son's homework a joke? Because you really can't ask him to do that!

I'm sure school has a laptop he can borrow to do his homework on - I'm fairly confident he won't be the first pupil they've had with a broken arm.

You've had a big shock. It's horrendous getting those phone calls from school when you don't know how bad things are going to be. Your child is in pain, the world momentarily stops turning and even when you know things are going to be okay again you need to unwind the pent up emotion.

Your title has been read by many as undertones of anger. Anger that you say you're not feeling but your emotions will no doubt be in turmoil (even if you're doing the graceful swan thing on the surface, your mind is no doubt racing).

I've had a couple of A&E visits with my DC. One because DS1 fell down the school stairs and was concussed. He was meant to be in a science lesson, he's autistic and has support in school. There had been an incident and the teacher had been delayed so DS took himself from the lesson to the quiet learning area as he doesn't cope with change and in his frustrated state miscalculated his step. He has pain threshold issues and wasn't sure if he'd been knocked out. The steps are concrete so he was covered in bruises and had an egg on his head.

We did the sitting in A&E thing - they were fab (our NHS is such a wonderful thing, I'm grateful everyday for its existence). The consultant suggested a large brandy as appropriate treatment - I was a bit shocked (again). The brandy was meant for me.

DS's wonderful teachers had left messages when we got back from our long A&E trip and it was after school hours so I couldn't contact them. We have a good relationship because being Autistic DS has an adjusted curriculum and high support needs so we have regular contact.

I emailed all was well but DS would need to be off for a day or two due to the bruising and concussion.

I thought they knew me quite well but when we actually spoke the next day the relief in his teachers voice, I won't forget. She cared as a person and parent herself first, but also because that horrendous constant undertone of litigation, investigations and life being on hold.

Teachers and coaches who are in it for the money are few and far between. Lunchtime coaching is pretty rare in my schooling experience too.

I think the way you've proposed moving forwards sounds appropriate and positive.

Hope that you and your DS are able to get some rest today.

OP's son made a joke about the coach doing his homework.

She's just going to pass the joke on.

It was the force of the ball that bent his wrist back and snapped

Exactly the same thing happened to DS2 4 weeks after he started uni last year, only it was his flatmate who kicked the ball. He got him to cook his dinners while he had his cast on.

Wrap your son up in cotton wool and never let him out of the house again! Seriously though, these things happen. There will be no long-term damage and it will give your son a good story to tell... My DP coaches rugby and his only serious injury has been at the hands of a small girl.

I had a similar thing happen to me when I was about 12. Playing football with the boys no I was in goal. I stupidly went to save it one handed and it bent my wrist back resulting in a very painful hairline crack. It was a pure accident.

Hi OP, this is an accident that happens all the time. He will recover quickly. Its a shock and I know you're worried about your son but he will be absolutely fine. I broke my own wrist recently in the most innocuous of circumstances, it was just an awkward fall in a muddy field; so I can see how it happened. I can think of at least three children that I have worked with who broke their wrist doing sport and one of my DP's colleagues recently broke his wrist playing football.

For gods sake op these things happen! Your title and original post was very accusatory at the coach. It was an accident for gods sake! .. And yes I agree u are totally back-pedalling now

Many 9yo boys can kick the ball hard enough for that to happen! Sounds like an unfortunate accident. OP, hope your ds recovers quickly.

Op you've had a problem with the reaction on here simply because of your thread title. You're absolutely blaming the coach when in actual fact, it's just an accident and these things happen. The exact same happened to my DSS many years ago when he was in goal. Sometimes, it's no-one's fault.

You're in danger of putting your DS off football or sport forever, which would be a real shame.

Hopefully you've come to the conclusion now that you don't need to do anything except chill out a bit.

I'm sorry for your DS. It was an accident. I'd start with the assumption that the coach is a well meaning person doing a valuable job - who is probably very upset about the injury. Sport involves risks but these are outweighed by the benefits. I'm worried by the litigious trend in society where everything has to be someone's fault.

My vicar broke my arm

Oh no, that's not kind.

Football is a contact sport. Bones get broken all the time. There is nothing to be "done" other than to follow the fracture clinic advice and let your son recover without any further drama.

As a follow up to this, one of DPs rugby players got injured last night at training and taken off in an ambulance. Nothing serious as it turns out but DP was certainly upset and felt responsible since the boy was under his supervision. The coaches are human and have feelings too (and often they are giving up their spare time for free to do something for your child).

You think I should do now with regards the school and their employed coach?
Absolutely nothing as it was an accident and also personally I think your title for your OP made it sound like the coach intentionally broke your child's arm.

he thinks the coach should do his homework for the next six weeks while he cannot write
30 years ago when I broke my arm at school not being able to write was a pain but nowadays most homework seems to be done on a computer so your DS can use that instead.