Smoking child

[Verbena37]

If you knew for a fact that someone you know had a child that was smoking aged 13, mainly from peer pressure (although this boy is definitely no saint), and you know the mum is normally quite strict but was no angel herself at that age, would you let her know her ds is smoking at the play park/skate ramps?

Or do I just leave it and not interfere?
I'm not friends with her on FB or in RL but will wave and chat a bit if I see her out. I would like someone to tell me if either of my dcs were seen smoking. I could find a mutual friend on FB and let them know and see if they pass it on?

Leave it leave it leave it.

That is all

Oh crikey is it me 😞 If I were the mum I would want to know. Just because she was a bit of a wild one in her past shouldn't mean her son should have complete rein to repeat all her mistakes. It's not like he's earned the right to ruin himself, just because she had a good attempt. He deserves better, though of course, he won't see it like that.

I expect she knows.

She'd smell it on his hair and clothes.

I have a 13 yr old ds and would absolutely want to know this.
I smoke myself unfortunately and he despises it but that doesn't take away the fact that the boy is only 13 and is possibly up to no good if hanging around with the wrong crowd.

Good point about smelling.....although I think the parents smoke, or at least the dad does, so not sure they'd notice.
It was because he hangs out with lads a lot older than him and they were making flame throwers with deodorant cans and stuff. Dh said to me that's what boys do when left alone but my ds heard them goading him into smoking and so he did.

The thing is the boy has been a little toad to my ds a lot of times when they've been at the park and if ive been there Ive asertively told him not to be so mean. So part of me thinks sod it, why should I bother. But then the kind mummy side of me thinks no child age 13 should be smoking.

If the parents smoke would they really care if their DS is smoking?

He's inhaling their smoke anyway.

Step away from this one......

I agree that she probably does know that her DS is smoking too. If you tell and it gets back that it was you, do you think her DS will take this out on your DS?

Tell her

What bollocks is that Jofferey ? I smoke, and my kids don't inhale it!? I'm outside. And bloody right I'd care if my children were smoking at 13

I'd stay out of it though OP, if she doesn't know it won't be long until she does.

How do they have the money for cigarettes at 13?

It's so expensive.

I'd want to know if my child was smoking

Leave it. When I was younger all kids where experimenting with smoking at 13 (although I accept its less common now)

Do you want to tell this woman her son smokes for his safety or as revenge because he's been nasty to your child? Keep out of it.

I would want to know. Can you get someone else to tell her?!

I agree that it's hard news to hear as a parent, from anyone, but especially someone who may have a slight grudge, (her son may tell his mother that you tell him off)...