Unfollwed on fb- trivial I know!

[Anotherdayanotherdollar]

Would you stay friends with somebody who unfollowed you on fb? I know it's pretty trivial but i'm quite hurt. I'm not one of the "huns" who post their whole lives on it. I have very few personal updates/photos up and nothing political/ethical or otherwise concerning!

I'm just a bit upset that she finds my stuff boring/uninteresting.

I thought the same as Lilly. Is it that type of issue?

If she's unfollowed you and anyone else with the "link", at least you know it's not personal. Infact you know why she's done it! So it wouldn't affect my decision to stay friends with her or not.

Lillyinthemoon something like that. I'm sure it is very hard for her and I know that I have absolutely no right to dictate how she should feel etc. But I thought we were getting our friendship back on track and this makes me think that she doesn't really accept my life now/ fears what I might post. Not that I post about ds anyway. If she doesn't want to read about what I post I feel she doesn't want to hear what I have to say in person either. She was/is such a close friend that i'm kinda scared not to have her in my life but i'm not sure how to do that if she can't accept that I have ds.

She has gone out of her way to keep the friendship and avoid offending you whilst causing herself the least amount of pain possible. Maybe you don't post about your DS, but she probably doesn't want to risk logging in one day to be ambushed by photos of children. She hasn't cut you out of her life, she's just possibly unfollowed you on Facebook. She clearly still wants to be your friend but is likely to be in a lot of pain and needs to protect herself right now. Infertility is an unimaginably painful thing to go through.

If she's that good a friend then give her time and accept that somethings may be too difficult for her to deal with right now. It's not about not accepting your new life, it's about protecting herself from pain.

Hope that post didn't come across as harsh. The tone was supposed to be compassionate but reading back it may not have come across that way.

I agree she is valuing your friendship by keeping you close in RL Facebook really doesn't matter I have unfollowed lots of people I adore in RL but not on Facebook if she is listening and accepting when you meet that's what matters

Lillyinthemoon I completely accept that she needs to try to minimise her pain.
Infertility isn't the issue by the way.
However, the actual issue has caused a lot of pain to her, and to me indirectly and has taken a huge toll on my mental health.
I know i'm making assumptions, and i'm also assuming that my son/fear of seeing my son/hearing about milestones etc is difficult for her. (Never had these things on fb) but my son is a my whole world. Is it reasonable to never mention something so big in my life?

Thanks for all the comments and different perspectives and opinions. Tbh at the moment i'm probably doing more of the work at trying to get our relationship back on track. Will keep at it a bit longer I suppose.

She hasn't asked you not to mention him though has she?? She has removed one (as you say your self you don't post a lot minor) method of communication. How does she respond when you all meet up?

Apologies, I jumped to conclusions with the infertility.

I don't think you have to avoid mentioning him, just don't go out of your way to do so either. Unless she states that she'd rather you didn't talk about him or you see that talking about him is upsetting her, then just let the conversation flow naturally.

for you and your friend.

Well I try to follow her lead. I don't go out of my way to mention him but then she doesn't mention him either and I feel I can't speak about him. When she sees him (infrequently) she's usually ok with him now.

That's hard do you have mutual friends who could shed light on anything? I don't think her unfollowing you on Facebook is a big deal but you need to be able to talk about your life inculding you Ds, to maintain a true friendship. You sound like you have been very sensitive towards her but maybe it's time for a honest sit down to find out where you both stand? Sounds rubbish for both of you

I unfollowed my sister she just likes lots of things and clogs up my wall. I wouldn't take it personally.

What I would do is expect that it said more about her than it said about me and ignore it.

I would base my friendship entirely on our RL engagement with each other. Social media can cause such unnecessary heartache, ignore your response to it and go with real life every time. All the best.