Wedding invitation

[aliphil]

I've just received an invitation to a friend's wedding; I knew I was going to be invited because I'd already been asked to sing. I'd kind of assumed DH and DD would be as well, but they're not on the invitation. Should I assume it's a mistake and query it, or just reply as from me? I can't go at all unless I can take DD, as DH is away with work that weekend and it's too long to leave her.

Background: I got to know the groom and his first wife from singing in the same choir, and DH just knows them through me. I've also met the bride to be but can't remember if DH has. The invitation was traditional, so from the mother of the bride, who doesn't know us.

If they're not on the invitation, they're not invited. If you can't go without your DD you'll just have to tell them that. They may say your DD can come, they may not - depends how much they want you to sing!

I know that's the standard thing, it just seems odd to me only to invite one half of a couple - not something I've come across before. I'm less surprised they might not want a 3yo there.

We invited some only halves of couples to our wedding. They all knew each other so had fun. We couldn't afford to invite people we'd only met a couple of times but they were invited and came to the evening party bit. It was a local ish wedding so easy for partners to just come for that bit. I've also been to weddings without my partner and didn't mind at all. I appreciate that the childcare will be an issue for you so it's a good idea to let them know the reason in case that will help change their mind.

Clearly it is a thing then! DH and I have sometimes attended without each other but never had one of us not invited before. I'll let them know I can't make it. Thanks.