Sexually assaulted by someone who now works with kids

[ThomasRichard]

This happened a long time ago when I was 16. I was working in an isolated area of the building and another employee came in, engaged me in conversation and then forced me to the ground and assaulted me. Not rape. I told two other employees and the manager, who ummed a bit and then didn't do anything.

Years on, I've now discovered that he's back at that same place in the position of manager. He'll be in daily, constant contact with teens the same age I was at that time and managing a large team, again the same age and circumstances.

I don't know what to do. I could pick him out of a line-up but I don't remember his name or the date or even the month it happened, although I could have a rough guess. The two colleagues I told now live abroad. I feel very uncomfortable knowing that he did this once and is now in a position of authority where he could easily do it again. Would the police even be interested?

I think you should report it to the police. They should certainly be interested.

I am sorry the people you told at the time did not treat it seriously as they should have done.

I think they'd probably be interested but wouldn't be able to do anything with 'some chap whose name I can't remember did x some time'.

How did you find out his current role? If you're sure it's the same man, I imagine it wouldn't be too difficult to find out his name. I'm also sure that the police are used to dealing with reports of historical rapes/assaults where not all the details are known. If you feel able to report it, I think you should.

I believe you.

Thankyou.

It came up in conversation with some friends I hadn't seen in a while.

I'm sorry this happened to you. I would tell the police too, it's possible it's still happening or will happen again and anything that could help prevent that is a good thing.

Don't worry about not knowing every detail of his ID - if you think about it, for most crimes the witnesses know even less about the perpetrator. You know enough for them to turn up at the work place and collect out the right person almost immediately, can you can confirm in a line up.

You're absolutely right to be concerned about his current position. If you feel able to report, it would be a good thing to do.

Sorry to hear you've been through this.

If you can't remember his name how do you know it's the same person?

The friend said his name, I recognised it, did a double-take and clarified that it was the same person, but have since forgotten it again I've been sitting on it for a few months but the feeling that I should do something hasn't gone away - hence posting about it so late as it was keeping me awake.

Ok, I think I will report it. I'm now an adult and there are children at risk. I have next weekend to myself. Do I need to book an appointment or just turn up at the police station?

Please please please at least have this logged or something. Anything. The man who raped me also worked in a setting with vulnerable teens (of which I was one) and after the CPS decided not to pursue the case he was allowed back to work as normal. This has haunted me for so many years and even though I hope sincerely he never hurt anyone again, if he did then I cling on to the hope that my complaint in his past might be enough to bring more weight to any future reports.

So sorry that this happened to you

From what I've read on MN by people who report, the area may have someone who specialises in historical sexual assaults.

So it's probably worth ringing in advance to get an appointment with the specialist.

You are a good person for doing this. Thank you on behalf of parents of teenagers who may be vulnerable.

I was sexually assaulted by a man years ago who now works with pigs, and so I don't feel I need to report him as a danger, but if he were working with vulnerable people I certainly would.

How could you forget his name again? Just ask the friend.

Sorry to everyone who has had such awful things happen to them

Well, it's now reported and I have an appointment for Saturday to give a full statement.

Even though I felt certain before making the call that it was the right thing to do, I'm shaking like a leaf and worrying that I won't be believed or that I'll cause a whole lot of trouble for nothing :(

If you want some support, ring Rape Crisis and ask if a volunteer can accompany you. Many people who contact them do so because of attacks that happened in the past. They will likely be familiar with the processes as well.

Thanks. It wasn't rape though?

Well done for reporting it OP. That took strength and courage.

It's a good idea to take someone with you on Saturday if you can. Is there anyone you're close to who would be supportive (eg partner, mum, sister, friend)? If not asking Rape Crisis about a volunteer would be sensible.

Remember you have done the right thing. Just tell them everything you remember and it will be ok.

PS Rape crisis support victims of sexual assault as well as rape.

That's good to know, thankyou.

I've just left the station. The police were great: they've taken a statement and hope to make an arrest quite shortly. It might go to court or it might not, depending on what this guy says, but either way it will now be flagged to the VIth form and on file.

We'll done! That was incredibly brave of you.

That's fantastic. Well done OP.
Now have a and/or , you deserve it!

I'm at the bank doing boring stuff but then I'm going to Costa to get a big hit chocolate with cream and marshmallows :)

it doesn't have to be rape for you to report it.
any assault is bad enough.
you did the right thing.