I haven't been married for long and am not sure what I can do to handle all the problems we are having.
At the weekend we has a major falling out. My husband was snappy with me all day and continuously talks to me like I'm a child. He always tells me he's better than me at everything and sometimes even puts on a silly childish voice if I ask him to explain something to me.
Anyway he was putting together a photo album for us on Saturday and I said hang on id like some say in what goes in our album. He agreed but not until after he had formed his list. I kept glancing at the photos on the computer and he got angry and turned them away from me and told me to stop looking and leave him be.
This escalated into a huge row because I'm not "allowed" access to our stored photos on his hard drive in case I mess something yo and accidentally delete them! This means the only time I get to see them is when I glance over his shoulder when he's looking at them or if I ask his permission.
I could understand if I wasn't computer savvy but I actually work in IT and know what I'm doing so I don't get why he does this.
Anyway it all built up for me and I started having a go at him. Part of me also resents how I'm not trusted to drive his car (even though hr drives mine which is more expensive than his), how he constantly criticizes my driving when he's a passenger in my car, how I cant fold towels properly...etc.
Anyway he sat there and said pretty much nothing when I had a go at him other than that I'm being unreasonable because its his hard drive the photos are on and how I have no right to his stuff. Then suddenly out of nowhere he explodes and starts throwing things around the room and grabs my shoulders really hard. I was scared he was going to hurt me. Then he walked out and left, saying he wasn't staying the night, although he came back about an hour later.
He then blanked me the whole of yesterday refusing to interact with me at all, and this morning when I asked him when he would talk he said when he's ready maybe not for days and its all my fault because I'm not getting my own way. I tried to talk to him about how he makes me feel and he wasn't interested in discussing it and said its my problem and if I don't like it I can get out and leave.
This isn't the first time things like this have happened. He won't engage in arguing with me when I'm upset and then ends up exploding and getting to the point he's almost violent with me and seems to have to leave to cool down. After this has happened he literally ignores me for days and says its my fault.
The patronising behaviour will then stop for a while but inevitably it always starts up again and leads to this.
I'm so fed up with it. He tells me all indo is moan and nag which I think is really unfair because I rarely ask him to do anything for me I'm actually independent with my own job, car and interests. It feels like all he wants to do in the evenings is come home and edit photos in front of the computer and he gets angry when I try to talk to him or want to talk about our future plans like a new house or starting a family together.
Normally when things are good they are really good but it always gets back to this. I feel like he honestly couldn't care less about me at the moment.
I know he's stressed at work and whenever he's stressed he gets like this.
I'm seriously not sure whether I should be staying in this marriage. It's only been a few months and all sounds quite trivial but it does feel like he doesn't care or have any respect for me.
He's also fallen out with his family since meeting me. He had a seriously controlling mother who has essentially cut him out of their family since he decided to get married and I know that's making him worse too. I've tried to get him to address the problem with his family or seek counselling but he seems emotionally to have just cut them out without a second thought but my fear is that he's bottling it all up and its all coming out in this rage when we argue about things that are pretty trivial
I don't know what to do, he wont talk to me or acknowledge my feelings and I can't go on like this :(