This happened at the end of November last year. I've only recently begun to get angry...
I live alone and in quite an isolated place. One dark winters evening towards the end of last year, there was a knock at the door and my nearest neighbour entered the house. Male neighbour. Drunk.
This is the sort of place where you don't turn people away, even though he was drunk, I've known him for over twenty years and our sons are best friends. I made him a cup of tea and sat him by the fire and we chatted.
Then it started - can I stay the night? Can I have sex with you? Can I touch your leg? What would you do if I touched your leg? Can I sleep in your bed? Just a cuddle? Fiddling with his crotch and saying 'well there doesn't seem to be much going on there anyway'.
Finally, after what seemed like a hundred 'no's' on my part, he said, 'oh, I know what it is, you're frigid, that's it, you're frigid.' To shut him up, I agreed. He was drunk and I was aware that most of it was drunk talk and also that he was having problems in his exisiting relationship to the point where they were almost splitting up.
After he left. I felt a bit violated and contaminated - not massively, just as though my space had been thoughtlessly invaded and it's very precious space at the moment because I'm not long out of a relationship and really didn't want any nonsense from men. Staying at home by the fire should be a way of stopping that, wouldn't you think?
Now here's the tricky bit - where I don't know what to do.
I expected an apology - even if he didn't remember half of what he said, an apology for invading my space and behaving inappropriately.
Nothing, zero, zilch. No apology.
I haven't seen him very much, paths just crossing at parties and other social gatherings. The wobbly relationship with his partner has been rekindled.
I feel yuk. I've talked about it with a couple of people who understand that I feel disrespected and used, but haven't been very helpful about what to do about it. I'm deliberately avoiding him because I don't want to have a conversation with him, which makes my social life slightly more difficult. For example, there's a party this evening for his girlfriends birthday. I have to go - but I'm dreading it.
Do I tell him how angry I am? Do I just start talking about it to anyone and everyone? Do I let it go? What would you do?