How do I address an invitation to a married Brigadier and Doctor with different surnames?

[MrsPixieMoo]

I need some help with how to send a formal invitation to a married couple. The man is a Brigadier and the woman is a doctor. She has her own surname. I wanted to put Brigadier X and Dr Y on the invitation, but my DH says the correct way is Brigadier X and Dr Y The Mrs X. It looks totally odd to me and I've never seen anything like that. Is he right?

I think your DH is "right", that probably is what Debretts says but in practise I think so many people today will feel the way previous posters do that it's safer to go with Brigadier X & Dr Y (or vice versa!) unless the guests are very Mrs Bucket types.

I have never ever seen 'Mrs.' with a definite article, only titles like 'The Hon.'

An invitation should be; Brigadier John Jones

A joint invitation should be; Brigadier John and Mrs Jones.

So I would go for Brigadier John Jones and Dr Jane Smith.

It doesn't really matter though, does it....the couple themselves aren't being "correct", so will hardly care.

I'd definitely go with the format you've suggested. I never expect anyone to use Dr as my title and I use both my maiden name and my married name depending on circumstance but I still raise an eyebrow at letters addressed Dr and Mrs. From what you've said the woman doesn't use her husband's surname at all - I think it would be very odd.