I have a friend who is a benefit cheat and is now getting a free boob job on the nhs because she has real psychological problems….??
She has been on job seekers and ESA for the past few years and has told me many times ‘I don’t want a job.’ This didn’t seem so bad at the time as she was at least going to college/uni so she wouldn’t have to be a shelf stacker. But she dropped out.
Now she is living back with her ex (who is probably only with her because benefits he often steals from both her and her child, cheats , lies, ect ect) he makes twice as much as my husband and they are claiming as if she is still a single mom. (so its not as though they are barely able to live without cheating)
Him living with her is so much worse than benefit cheating, and free boob jobs (if he didn’t make her feel like she was worthless would she still want one?)
I have tried talking to her 100s of times about both him, about how she might get caught cheating the system (she has a lot of enemies because of him and she post this all to facebook –sigh-)
A part of me I will admit is jealous of her getting so much money , we struggle. But she can have every single penny if it meant I had to live with him. I think her self esteem is so low she feels like she has no choice. I have tried to get her to see a therapist or something…. She does not want to admit anything’s wrong until it is and then all is forgiven in a few days (or hours) .
I'm partially worried now as her child is now old enough to copy and think this is normal way to behave. (thinking that your only as good as daddy tell you. you are, raging fights, stealing money ect) And she has just announced that she wants another baby to him.
I'm so worried about my friend for all of the reasons above and so much more ( not unless you want to read a novel)
I'm out of ideas of how to talk sense in to her. What would you do?