Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Would you go away without your DC on their birthday?

53 replies

Pennies · 07/10/2013 19:44

We have been invited to a very glam and exciting sounding weekend which will be incredibly good fun. The trouble is is that it's a whole weekend away from Friday morning until Sunday evening and my DD's 8th birthday will be on the Friday. We can't celebrate it the week before or the week after due to other things already in the diary and then it's Xmas and New Year.

Would you go or not?

OP posts:
defineme · 07/10/2013 19:57

If you really want to then I would celebrate big style on the Thursday...after school restaurant with friends and party games or go bowling or whatever she would like. Then big present (including maybe some experiences so days out to look forward to) on the Friday morning before school. Pack bag with treats/dvds for Grandparents and maybe a low key trip out that they could manage for the weekend?

I'd sell it to her that you are here on her birthday morning and that's what counts.

I am going to a gig on my ds's 12th birthday, but that'll be after the party tea with grandparents and he'll have a sleepover with his friends the weekend before.

Sleepingbunnies · 07/10/2013 19:58

No.

DurhamDurham · 07/10/2013 20:00

I would so want to go but wouldn't do it. I would not have fun knowing I had left my child to have fun without him on his birthday. Just doesn't seem right.

stillenacht · 07/10/2013 20:01

No

defineme · 07/10/2013 20:01

But she can have a nice meal out or something on the Thursday and go to Harry potter world 2 weeks after?

My boy girl twins often do something a couple of weeks after if it's a big trip out--sometimes they do separate things so it's not possible to fit them all in on the 'right' weekend.

I don't think it's that awful, but I do appear to be in the minority!

5madthings · 07/10/2013 20:03

Nope, dp has to go away for ds1's bday with work every yearand it's crap, ds1 hates it and so does ds1 so I would never choose to be away on their bdays.

Floggingmolly · 07/10/2013 20:03

No.

Mintyy · 07/10/2013 20:04

Do you really have to ask?

TooTabooToBOOOOO · 07/10/2013 20:05

No it wouldn't even cross my mind. It's one day a year.

I'm sure you being there in the morning would be great for her - make her know how special she is, erm no actually it won't she will wonder why her parents would rather spend her birthday without her.

My mum is 56, she still talks about her 9th birthday when she was handed a Mud LP and watched as her parents buggered off camping for the weekend, leaving her in the care of her older sister. It hurt her and she says she can still remember the upset now.

I am gobsmacked that, work commitments aside, anybody wouldn't spend the day with their child.

Ireallymustbemad · 07/10/2013 20:06

No, I wouldn't go and leave my 8yo on their birthday either.

TooTabooToBOOOOO · 07/10/2013 20:07

actually in '66 it probably wasn't Mud, buggered if I know which band it was though

darkdays · 07/10/2013 20:08

Absolutely not, how selfish!

BoffinMum · 07/10/2013 20:10

No.

Your child will get the impression you don't give a shit.

DSM · 07/10/2013 20:11

Yep. And I have done. As long as you celebrate another day I don't think it's a big deal.

I didn't see my mum on my birthday from age 9-30!

We don't make a huge fuss over birthdays anyway, maybe that's why it's not an issue for us but I find the whole 'special day' thing kind of cringey.

AcrylicPlexiglass · 07/10/2013 20:11

No. Definitely not. I couldn't bear to miss one of my children's birthdays and 8 is a great age!

fatmumjane · 07/10/2013 20:20

NO!!!!

Hulababy · 07/10/2013 20:23

No I wouldn't chose to miss DD's birthday.

Hulababy · 07/10/2013 20:27

See, I have no issue with parties and special treat days, etc being before or after the actually birthday. But I still couldn't miss the actual day with DD unless it was essential for me to go away. There is, for me anyway, something special about the actual day itself - presents in the morning, more when they get home from school, special birthday tea with cake...

usualsuspect · 07/10/2013 20:29

No

Chubfuddler · 07/10/2013 20:32

While they are still children and the choice is mine, I would choose to spend the anniversary of the day I have birth to them with my children. It really is that simple.

NotScared · 07/10/2013 20:32

No. DS1 is 16 and still remembers exdh going to London on a trip for one of his birthdays.

KatyPutTheCuttleOn · 07/10/2013 20:32

Hell would freeze over before I would go.

SoonToBeSix · 07/10/2013 20:33

No definitely not.

flipchart · 07/10/2013 20:34

Not at 8.

I was away for DS's birthday this year though but it was his 17th!!

RevelsRoulette · 07/10/2013 20:35

I wouldn't. Not at that age. Things like that matter to kids.

Swipe left for the next trending thread